Saturday, November 29, 2008

Our Thanksgiving (and beyond)

Boy was it a roller coaster ride!

It started out great - sleeping in, then making Mr. Daddy's famous salsa and getting ready to head over to Uncle Harold's and Aunt Mary's for some great family fellowship and food...

We pulled up and Toby Keith was playing and Itty Bit was singing along (yeah, hilarious). So we all three stayed in the car and sang along with him.

Then we headed inside to lots of hugs and "Wow, he's getting big!". It took all of 20 minutes for Itty Bit to start his demonstration of why he needed a nap.
Before our eyes, he transformed into that kid. You know, the brat that everyone in the store shakes their head at and silently chides the parents for not disciplining them...
Well, we WERE! And it wasn't working! You know I wanted to find a rock to hide under.
He became so unruly it was impossible to enjoy the afternoon. The last straw was him pushing down his little cousin. We gave up and headed home with a screaming child.

Can I say I wasn't feeling very grateful?

He went straight into his bed with a chocolate milk bottle that I'd warmed. He spent 20 minutes screaming "NO WARM!" between sobs. Until I picked him up and said nothing but, "sweetie, okay, okay, okay". He laid back into my arms and closed his eyes and finally let his crying subside.

And I realized that it had been so long since I had held him like this and rocked him to sleep. In the "he needs to learn to go to sleep on his own phase"... I had literally not rocked him in months. And it was comforting to ME.

I was alone with my thoughts and the little boy whose breath was slowly becoming even. I was bewildered by the events of the day and wondered where my sweet boy had gone. I began to pray. For wisdom, for understanding, for peace and patience for both of us.

Well, my back lasted all of seven minutes with a sleepy boy in my arms. I laid him in my bed and pulled the soft quilt up to his tummy. He sighed and patted my had.

It had been a rough day - for all three of us. But sometimes true gratefulness needs a window into "what if". Would I trade the trantrum-filled day for one moment of my infertility heartache? Not a chance.

So my thankfulness was back. A bit deeper and attached to a few more prayer requests that God would transform ME.

As I sat with my husband's arm around me and pressed "Play" on the remote, I was content. So content with the life God has blessed us with.

(and it wasn't all bad... look at the delight on Itty Bit's face to see cousin J!)


He & Me + 3 said...

Some days are like that. I am so glad that even in the midst of chaios we do have so much to still be thankful for. Great capture of his expression! He is so cute!

Jaime said...

I am so right there with you! I'm glad you had some good snuggle time to help at the end. :-) Maybe that was what Rand and I needed the other day...

Stacy said...

Sorry to hear you had a meltdown. Those things happen and you are right about just getting some perspective. They can push our buttons, but we have to move past those moments and be grateful we have the little buggers to hug. :)