Monday, December 01, 2008

My turn

Okay, this has gone on far too long…

Mr. Daddy decided to post that lovely little story about his sweet wifey poking her head out the window, then leaning out and angling for a better shot of a total stranger’s mostly naked bum.

Then getting totally busted by the other guy who was with him.

Then their suddenly hurried exit from the gas station lot when they realized just how big those two mad dudes were.

(at the risk of obliterating any respect you might hold for me - if you haven’t read his post, I'll wait right here for ya)

So let me lay it out for y'all. I know you’ve already heard it from Mr. Daddy, but it bears some explaining. Cuz, man this story has been spreading like wildfire around here!

You know what…?

I got nothin’

It happened just like Mr. Daddy said it did.

No sense in trying to explain it.

Cuz I cannot for the life of me, figure out why I though it was even remotely a good idea to try to capture that sight on a cellphone camera… or any camera for that matter.

I mean, how do you even apologize for that?


To make matters worse… Dear Husband sits down at my family’s table on Thanksgiving and says,

Rach asked me for my phone so she could take a picture of a stranger’s naked butt.

DEAFENING SILENCE

(I crack myself up with these hearing loss puns)

As one, my entire family is speechlessly looking at Mr. Daddy in horrified interest.

I AM SO MORTIFIED

My mouth turns to Play-doh and nothing intelligible comes out.

Then my aunt’s sweet naïve mother says in her 100% Italian voice (you know, with one eyebrow raised), “WHAAAAAAT?”

There is no place to hide, and I’m not giving up my seat for the game of Spoons.

(mumble mumble, there was this guy, mumble, full moon, mumble mumble, camera)

YOU WHAAAAAAAAT?

Everyone has even stopped eating - so shocking is this piece of news.
So Mr. Daddy tells the tale in all his mock indignation and leaves the entire extended family with not a single hope for my corrupted soul.

~

I survive the brutal re-enactments and head home. To wake up to Mr. Daddy’s creative genius in print.
On our blog. You know, the one I used to put my best foot forward on?

And the comments are UNBELIEVABLE.

Like wet-your-pants-funny.

I read two of them and realize they are another husband-wife team. I chuckle loudly until I reach the last line of the husband’s comment.

(Wife)
Okay, if you open your windows you will hear my muffled laughs as I was reading this delightful story...and I am trying to keep my composure since Dw is taking an afternoon snooze on the couch not 10 feet from me giggling into the palm of my hand...What is up with men like that anyway? Can they not feel a breeze whisking its way down their cheeks?? Come on dudes! Stop grossing out the entire world! Loved it and still smirking...can't wait till he wakes up and I can read it to him...

( Husband)
You "crack" me up! I'm still trying to "wipe" the smile off my face. Linny was just giggling as she read it to me. I am so very thankful your wife didn't have a zoom lens! I’m sure they were hoping not to be the "butt" of your jokes. I'm still trying to figure out how to work this into tomorrow's message... maybe a title like, "Showing your best side butt don't let your guard down."

When I got to that last line, I felt the color drain out of my face. If you know this couple, they are the fabulous ones from A Place Called Simplicity.


The part that scared the bejeebies out of me, is that this man is a

P A S T O R.

And somehow my temporary insanity is going to mean that someday at some pastors’ conference, they’re gonna talk about the 14 different versions of that “girl trying to take a picture of a guy’s backside with her husband’s phone” story.

And ya know what? I’m okay being the “butt” of that joke.

5 comments:

He And Me + 3 said...

Rachel,

You are too funny, I can so appreciate your sense of humor. Not sure when you will live this one down, but atleast you are ok with it. LOL Sort of...right?

katemcdonald said...

Ok...so I am just catching up with what can be described as this saga... and I LOVE IT. You two are hilarious! This is going to be one of those stories you cannot outlive...embrace it :)

Thanks for the comments on my blog... I like to meet "lurkers"- where did you say that poem came from?

Killlashandra said...

You just have a wonderful sense of humor. ;) My kids would have been aiming for a picture too. LOL

Following Him said...

What a sense of humor. This cracks me up!!!
~Elyse~

Mom Of Many said...

So here you are making me laugh again - all the way over here in Uganda....I will have to tell Dw to read it...he could use the laughter too... (He is having such a hard time not being here with all of this...thank you for your prayers!!)...
Much love from Uganda,
Linny