Wednesday, March 25, 2009

D.O.B.----D.O.D.(Date of Birth-Date of Death) by Mr. Daddy

I attended a classmates' funeral today.
Seems as if there are getting to be fewer and fewer of us as the years go by...

Probably doesn't help that I come from a small hick town. (pop. of about a 1,000), which means the school size is similar. If memory serves me correctly there were about 55 or 56 in my graduating class.

But that's not what I wanted to talk about......

What intrigued me today was something the pastor that was giving the eulogy asked.

What is the most important thing on the headstone in the cemetery? He proceeded to name off a list of things that were printed on most headstones, and then came to his point......

That being: what was between the D.O.B. and the D.O.D.

He used that as the starting point to talk about Joe's life..

That nothing on that headstone mattered more than what was done between those two dates.......

Not his name....

Not that he was a son.....

Not that he was a husband.....or a father... or a brother..

Nor any words of an epitaph, that someone else had put there......

As he went on to fill in the blanks between the Date of Birth and Date of Death, I rediscovered and old friend. Now you can't go to school in Hicksville with someone for 12 years and not know a little about them, even if you didn't remain close after graduation. Especially when aunts and uncles and siblings went to the same school, and our families grew up on the same prairie. (And no, I did not go to a family reunion to find a date for my senior prom...thankyouverymuch. I just didn't go........ *grin*)

Through the eulogy, and then the testimonies that followed, I realized that a man had grown out of the memories of the boy I knew. Joe's family can be proud of the fact that he had filled the blanks very well....

And then it happened: that still small voice in my heart, "Are you proud of the blanks?"

I don't think so!!!

I will have to work harder on them........



How about you?

20 comments:

Rob said...

Great post. Thanks for sharing. Sorry for the loss. It was sad and nice all at the same time. Makes me now want to think about the blanks now in my life

Shanda said...

Funerals have a way of doing that: making life come back into focus, causing us to reflect on how we are living, and how we have lived...

Taking pause to consider my own "blanks..."

Pam said...

Now I know why your day was so rough. So sorry! Glad I could make you laugh, though.

Everyone should be so reflective about their own life. The world would probably be a better place if we were all concerned with our "blanks".

Killlashandra said...

Interesting eulogoy indeed. Right now I'm proud of many of the blanks, life has so many ups and downs that I do think sometimes you don't realize you should be proud more often. :) I'm sorry for the passing of a classmate, however, it sounds like a wonderful service.

Pam D said...

That little dash... and it means so much. I think you must be underestimating yourself OR thinking about someone else's blanks, because in the short time I'VE "known" you via your blog, I think you'll leave behind a very well-written lifesong for your son to carry in his heart. I'm just sayin'.... it seems pretty solid from here. Not that all of us can't stand to work harder at it every day... but I don't think you have anything to worry about. Well, except for maybe a few of Mr. Daddy's comments... lol! (he is awesome.. he even came over and commented on my blog.. what a man!)

He And Me + 3 said...

I know I am not always proud of my blanks...But it is not always easy...just today I blew it with Stunt Man. Ugh. I want the files of my life to be ok for everyone to read, especially my Heavenly Father.

Kelli said...

Great post!! I have heard something similar to this at a funeral too. Thanks for sharing!

Stacy said...

Brian came from a pretty small town, too, and a few of his classmates have passed on. That was a great eulogy, and definitely something to thing about. Thanks for the words to ponder. :)

jennykate77 said...

Makes me think of that e-mail that was floating around for a while. It was a mini-movie/video called "The Dash". It is so touching and really makes you think about how you fill up the "dash" of your life. We shouldn't count the moments, but makes every moment count.

katemcdonald said...

wow. silencing kind of post. thanks for sharing.

and I know this two comments don't go well together, so forgive me, but that photo at the top of your blog is RIDICULOUS,...wow. great photo; beautiful boy.

Elaine at Matters of the Heart) said...

This is so powerful. Sorry that you had to go to the funeral, but sounds like something came of it. Thank you for passing it on.

Tim said...

This reminded me of "The Dash". Have you heard it?

Love and Prayers,

Tim

Andy and Wendy Ingram said...

You don't know me and I just stumbled accross your blog tonight. This is a very great blog. It challenges me to think what you asked "am I proud of the blanks" honestly I think "am I going to have regrets". I am only 40 years old, but you know, God is certainly the one the writes our days, not us. I do desire to be a better wife, mom, and so much more. To really make a difference in this world. Mostly, I want to become a better mom. Thanks for the thought-provoking blog and blessings!
Wendy
Colorado Springs, Colorado

Melissa said...

Great post ~ you're really getting people to think...
thanks for sharing it, I will be working on the dash.

Rachel said...

Thanks for posting this hon. Love how you write and how you make me think.

You're amazing.

Pam D said...

Um, Mr. Daddy? I'm sorry I confused you with Rachel.. but I would hope you see that as a compliment. Because she totally rocks as a writer, and if I thought you were her, then you do, too!

Jill (Sneaky Momma) said...

Your post reminds me of the poem The Dash by Linda Ellis:
http://www.simpletruths.tv/dashpoem/

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Rachel said...

Sorry. Need to close comments because we are drowning in spam on this one for some reason...