Sunday, May 31, 2009

If something can go wrong...

in the world of Rachel; it can and most often will.

Today was no exception. To set the scene: last month, my mother begged, cajoled, pleaded, threatened to tell everyone my sleepwalking stories, asked me to dance at a women's church retreat for this weekend.

Remember this?

Well, I pretty much hung up these:

since then.

Somehow she got me to tentatively commit to performing a song that had many sign language parts and hopefully would spare my back from anything strenuous.

She's a sneaky one... she knew she had it in the bag even if it was only "tentatively".

So I worked for a month at really stretching, working my way through a few barre exercises in the living room.

But every time I turned the durned music on, some little squirt would come running and want to join in. Ever tried doing this:

When you've got competition for the dance floor?

(yes, I realize that my husband will not be speaking to me for the next few days... but will be glad to know that Itty Bit wanted it OFF!)


To top it off, we spent the WRONG day riding Kona, cantering her over trot poles, posting all over the place (those of you who have ridden - you can testify to how unbelievably sore you get, right?)

So I was barely able to walk for a week before this performance was scheduled.

And that lovely bump on my wrist (you're welcome for not posting that picture again), and the obnoxiously loud crack my shoulder and neck make every time I try to move... you can see this was going splendidly.


First things first... I had to figure out how to get there. Printed the directions off the camp website - no prob.

Oh wait... Mr. Daddy knows a shortcut. Of course he knows a shortcut. He's a man.

Well, that "shortcut" contained 27 additional turns for a town 34 minutes away. Oh yeah, throw in a couple of wrong road names and it's even more fun.

Folks, I spent the entire drive freaked out that I was gonna miss one of those 27 turns. And yep, it was a shortcut alright. I shaved 3 minutes off my route. Yeah, 180 stinkin' seconds.


Finally get there and do a quick sound check. I ask my mom, "what did we used to do for this part? I don't remember the choreography."

She shoots me a look, just as I remember.

Oh yeah.

Oh no.

"Honey, just try it."

"I haven't done that since before the accident."

"Just try it."

"Fine. Now how am I supposed to get up?"

Yes folks, after not dancing for 14 months, I temporarily lost my mind and went down into the splits.

And if my insurance adjuster is reading this - YES, it hurt like the dickens, and NO it didn't used to.


I get up there and the music starts.

Ever have something happen at the worst time? Like when your mouth goes dry?

Oh geez. I try to smile and my lips stick to my teeth. I can imagine the audience's confusion at the nervous deaf girl giving them a weird smile/grimace.

If you know anything about ballet, it is the art of doing something that requires an insane amount of control and strength, while making it look as if you are a dainty little butterfly.

By the first chorus - I can feel the entire year of not dancing catch up. I, for one, have not mastered the art of breathing through my pores - and am trying mightily not to gasp for air as my heart pounds and my mind tells my stomach: "throw up! throw up! abandon ship!" My back rails against me for deigning to attempt the splits again, and of course it's the perfect time for a panic attack of "what if I trip?"


I got through it. And I have more to post on it another time... about lessons learned. God picks funny times to teach, doesn't He?


And of course, in an effort to simplify my route home, I went looking to turn left on 153rd Street.

I drove and drove and finally passed 159th. Oh, I must be getting closer.

Drive drive drive.

Ooh, look at that horse bucking around in the arena next to the road! Fun!

Okay, just passed 184th Street.


But before I could turn around, this knocked my socks off.


I think the detour was a blessing in disguise.


So how was your weekend?


Kelly @ Sufficient Grace Ministries said...

My weekend was amazing...thanks to MckMama and the amazing mighty God we serve! Just wanted to stop by and thank you for your comment on her blog this weekend, and to let you know that I'm praying God's continued comfort for your family members who lost their precious baby.

Blessings to you,
Kelly Gerken
Sufficient Grace Ministries

Unknown said...

The Lord touches you in unsuspecting times... amazing,I'm glad you had a great detour! What a day! I always love your stories Rachel, Your humor gets me giddy!

He & Me + 3 said...

Ok, when you said splits I cringed. Yikes. I am just getting over the pain from the first few days of the Shred. Body aches are not fun at all. Glad that you got through it.
What beautiful scenery you captured. Like a painted picture.

Anonymous said...

An amazing detour scene!

What I wouldn't give to have had someone film that dance just to share with us! ;)

Eyeglasses & Endzones said...

Man...I was not following you when that whole car crash thing happened....YIKES...and if you can really put all your body weight on your tip toes....HATS OFF...that is awesome and I know why you might be sore!!!

brian said...

Looks like Rainer is about to erupt again....


Kameron said...

Sounds like you mom owes you big time!! I'm glad you got through it, now take a nice hot bath with some epsom salt in it and you might just recover! :o)

Anonymous said...

You drove to JAPAN??

HAHAHAHAHAHAH just teasin'. ;)

I'm so glad you did it though!! I wish there were PICTURES!

Carebear said...

Aaaaahhhh!!! Great shot of Rainier. I saw it on our way to church and didn't have my camera. I said to hubby. "Those clouds will be gone by the time we make it back home." Sure enough, I missed the opportunity. Love your photo. And your story. Looking forward to more on lessons learned...

BTW: Ha, ha, ha at Itty Bit in the tutu. My husband was pretty ticked when I posted the little Beast in a swimsuit, but some things are just too funny not to share, eh?!

Stacy said...

Glad you were able to make it through and push yourself. I can't imagine doing all of that, but I'm sure the audience was happy to see you perform. Now make sure to use some icy hot on those sore muscles. ;)

Beautiful shot of the mountains, too...definitely worth a little drive. :)