Friday, June 05, 2009

Revenge??? or Explanation? (you be the judge)

OK people

the secret is out.....

Let me start from the beginning.... ( I think that I'm going to have to 12 step my way outta this one.)

Hello.


My name is (Mr. Daddy will have to do.) :o)

I am an addict.


I must confess that I would not be coming outta the closet, if it was not for the help of my ornery, sneaky, Uummm, beautiful bride. And I'm here to tell you that if I didn't have as big a phobia about needles as Rach, I would be mainlining that stuff. And as snorting liquid just doesn't seem to cut it for me. (too much choking, hacking and gagging) to get the fully desired effects, my method of choice is the BOTTLE!!!

There I have said it: AAaahhhhhh!!!!! how freeing, how invigorating this power of confession...( I would do a dance of joy, if I wasn't shackled by this walker, thanks Pam D. for letting that little secret out....)

Contrary to popular belief it; was not Ensure that was the contents of the bottle, and thanks Lisa for the tip about Boost - I will keep that in mind (for when the time comes) LOL

Nope people, it was the pure unadulterated concoction of vanilla and chocolate soy milk. There my secret is out. I was hooked on it by an old snake charmer in my assorted and distant past of misadventures....

It is an insidious brew, of odious and delectable flavors, an elixir of strange and terrible portents. But truly a nectar of the Gods....

As you can see by the pictorial contributed by my ornery, sneaky, dutiful bride, it does strange and demeaning things to people. "O" how the mighty have fallen... (not that I think of myself as mighty, but lofty terms and phrases always make for a more entertaining story....... Right?)
"O" how the proud are brought low...(in this I must admit to divine intervention..... Ouch!)
"O" how the haughty are humbled... (with a little help from my "best" friend....Thanks for nothing hon!!!)

Now I have said all that, to say this: revenge Explanation is so sweet... "O" yeah Baby:
I know that some have thought that this would make me mad??? "not so"
a little chagrined, maybe that the love of my life would be so willing to be of such service to our Lord, as to help me so freely work my 12 step????

But Mad??? No never!!
Who could be mad at a chick who would be so open about herself, as to frequent nude beaches??


Or this: You might wonder where I get the idea of "O. She is so liberal and expressive of her person. Wouldn't you agree??? *Notice the lucky location of the Old Navy logo... "O" how fortuitous

Or this self portrait, that shows her true beauty!!!!
I'm still falling in love with her...

Isn't she such a beauty Queen????

And there you have it my friends....
A small part of the RRRREEeeeSsssssttttttt of the story...(Or should I say the continuing saga cause you can bet your sweet bippy that she aint gonna take this one lying down) ROFL, snort, wheeze, hiccup, and as Dana would say: BAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaa!!

P.S. Carebear I want you to know that I didn't refer to the Funk & Wagnalls or the theraaaaaaaas whatever. Nope not me,,,,, (not even once)

19 comments:

Rachel said...

Duuuuuude! You did NOT put a nekkid picture of your wife on the blog.

Or talk about her boobies (cuz Lord Knows that kid of yours loves that word - and at the worst public times).

And I sure didn't post pictures of you with your eyes looking all crazy like that.

Come on guys... do you really think the punishment fit the crime? OUCH! ;)

Now I'm gonna be nice, cuz that crazy man of mine gave in to my pleas to haul the horse over to a play field... cuz this cowgirl is still too scared to drive a big truck, LOL

Paige said...

I agree... BAAAAHHHHHAAAA! That's awesome! My husband will most likely NEVER have author rights on my blog! Love ya Rachel, but Mr. Daddy.. That rocked!

Lisa said...

Ohhh... Mr. Daddy. I think you have earned your Magnum title back! I was really beginning to wonder about the "O" and then you graciously explained. Thanks! LOL (It actually took me a second to get it. Guess cause I am a woman. And I was trying to find something that Rachel was actually doing, not wearing!) And all you did with that naked baby picture was prove exactly how adorable Rach was as a naked toddler and HOW MUCH Itty Bit looks JUST LIKE HER! So, to me, the "naked pictures on the beach" backfired a little. If she was like 14 & up, THEN we would have been talking embarrassing. But I think the rest of the pictures 'got the job done!' So, Bravo, Mr. Daddy. Your male pride should be fully intact!!! Just don't trip in your walker, cause now THAT would make for a great picture! Tee Hee.

Shanda said...

Can I just say up front that I am SO GLAD that Rach mentioning my comment 'practically daring her' didn't somehow rope me in as some kind of accomplice?! Whewwww!!! I was sweatin that one a little!

The beach picture is completely adorable. (You are truly such a great guy at heart! Even in getting even you allow her to be completely adorable in at least ONE photo!)

Lisa's right! Your Magnum title is back!

Life with Kaishon said...

Oh my gosh : ). That is so funny that you have a naked picture on your blog. Did you ever imagine that when you first started your blog? Funny : )

Kameron said...

Payback was a comin, I knew it wouldn't take too long! Nice pictorial!

Liz (Loving Mom 2 Boys) said...

Now this is a great fight....can't wait to see what comes next!!!

As for the nekidd picture...that is far too cute to be embarrassing!!

Mr. Daddy said...

But DEAR!!!!
it wasn't punishment....
just a simple working on my 12 step,and a great pictorial of the love of my life...*snicker*

Pam D said...

Rachel... there's ALWAYS Photoshop, dear. heh. I feel sure that you could clone whatEVER you wanted to into a picture (*wink, wink*). No matter how big.. OR SMALL.... (*WINK*). heh. Not that you would ever do anything like that, especially to a dear old soul who would totter out to the truck, climb from walker to seat, and haul your horse for you. Oh, Mr. Daddy.. you are the epitome of husbandly helpfulness. A magnificent manly miracle... (who just happens to swing by the geriatric aisle of the drugstore every now and then..). And geez, Rachel, really.. could Itty Bit look any MORE like you? what a cute pic...

He And Me + 3 said...

Is this even steven or do you have some paybacks now too Rachel?
BTW...You look just like itty bitty. Wow.
cute baby picture!

Heather said...

Ok, come on Rachel, fire back, fire back!!!! We're waiting!!!

p.s. I just dared my Chadly to hijack my blog and write something clever and he just rolled his eyes at me and went back to his laptop. Psh! What a dork. Mr. Daddy is so hilarious! I don't think there's a husband out there who could compete!

Elaine at Matters of the Heart) said...

Oh Rachel, this is just too good to let go. He out did you, I know you could keep this going.

By the way that baby picture of you is ADORABLE.

I'll email more on our precious baby name we share tomorrow when I am rested.

Lisa said...

Just had to check back in and see how the commenting was going on, and if anything new had developed along the lines of retaliation! You guys not only crack me up, but show what great personalities you have. Also, members of my family who regularly read my blog keep suggesting "Oh, That would be a great TST..." about various things. You guys have a way of becoming addictive! LOL

Rachel said...

Good Heavens... this man has been guffawing obnoxiously at every comment. Forget chocolate soy milk, YOU GUYS are gonna be his drug of choice if you keep this up! :)

Moral of this story: never give your husband author rights to your blog (right on Paige), and always password protect your photos. It didn't help that he also went through TWO BOXES of photographs... out of a desire for pure revenge my friends.

Though I am somewhat mollified that y'all think that Itty Bit looks like me - now you look at that kid and tell me he'd be easy to discipline???

One last warning for my Dear... payback is even better when you've EARNED it!

Pam D said...

Girlfriend.. there is ALWAYS the ultimate weapon. You KNOW what that is, don't you?

momof3darlings said...

OHHHH...or is it just "O" (snicker, snicker)....I SO needed this! BAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAA! I LOVE it!!

I love you, Rachel, in the LEAST gay way possible (ya gotta be careful throwin' that phrase around these days, especially with you wink wink), but this post is TOTALLY hilarious!

melody is slurping life said...

Rach, all is fair in love and revenge. I love these photos!

You did good, Mr. Daddy.

brian said...

Who were you mooning in that picture?

Stacy said...

Wow, Mr. Daddy surely should get some revenge on him for posting a nekkid picture of you Rachel! LOL! Oh but it was a cute picture! I'm pretty sure my hubby would be in some deep doo doo for posting those pictures LOL!