Monday, June 01, 2009

True Story Tuesday



Sorry y'all. Mr. Daddy has his nose in a book and this week's post was left to me. So you get the loooong version, instead of the short and sweet one ;)
~

Ready for True Story Tuesday? It's a chance to give us the whole story of what really happened on that Not Me Monday. Or to share what seems too amazing/outrageous/miraculous/hilarious to have happened in real life.

I know there’s a zillion great stories already written buried in your old posts… so it would be easy-peasy to just link up and share your stuff! So… please join along! Grab the button and share a link!
~

This week goes waaaay back in time when Rach was a little girl.
So get ready to enter prehistoric times on an adventure I like to call


THE HOKE-Y POKE-Y

So maybe I haven’t shared this in one a random post yet… but I have a decent needle phobia. Kinda explains why I’m not working alongside you in the Labor & Delivery room, eh Julie?

Me and this phobia go way back.
It’s not like the phobia did me a lick o’ good… cuz no matter how hard I tried to avoid it – the lovely little pokey was a frequent visitor in my life.

After I lost my hearing at 4-years old, I entered a clinical trial at Stanford - which translated into an awful lot of pokes.

(No, the steroids didn’t help my hearing loss, Yes they are illegal to use on animals, and DON’T YOU DARE say, “well that explains a lot!”)

Anyhoo… I developed a keen sense of an impending blood draw or shot. And though I hated those blasted sharp things, I preferred docs and nurses who were upfront about it.

~

Fast-forward a year – to my last major ear surgery.

When I say major, I mean cut-your-ear-and-fold-it-back-against-your-cheek MAJOR.

From the start, pretty much everything they did guaranteed a major freakout.

Bringing me to visit an older patient recovering from the same shunt scared the H-E-doublehockeysticks out of me. She was weak, unsteady on her feet, and had a set of Frankenstein stitches over an angry red incision on her bald head. The bloody bandages didn’t help either.

*gulp*

(Sidebar: whose dumb idea was it scare the snot out of a little kid by showing them the results of the same procedure you want to do on THEM? Well, it wasn't my mom’s idea, though she had to deal with the unsurprisingly terrified kid).

Shaving half my curls off wasn’t on my list of fun things to do either.

But as we walked down the hall and I started getting a vague sense that I was being nonchalantly herded into a room… that sixth sense started tingling…

Sure nuff… the door was blocked and I was backpedaling at the sight of a row of those little chairs with the funny side piece that flips over for your arm.

Those can only mean one thing.

And seriously – there’s like 12 of them there against the wall. What, do they have phlebotomy contests in there or something?

~

I am already looking at my mother with desperation in my eyes – she looks sad like she always does.

~

Then the nurse does it.

She looks this 7-year old kid in the eyes and lies.

“It won’t hurt a bit honey”


Are.you.kidding.me? I’ve had more of those “won’t hurt a bits” in the last year than this woman would probably have in her lifetime. And never, ever, ever has one “not hurt a bit”.

Weenie, I know.
But when you’ve lost control of everything else, those little things matter.

Liar, liar, pants on fire.

~

My mother shoots Nurse Lady an "I can't believe you just said that" look (the kind I've seen many times aimed my way since).
Nurse Lady starts walking to me… actually trying to hide the syringe.
Nightmare in real life thing is totally happening my head.
And for some reason, I do the only thing that makes sense.

Oh yeah… I RAN.

~

Not toward the blocked door, but across the room. Yelling like a wild child.

NO!
NO!
NO!


She actually chases me.

And I am trapped. Except for a final Hail Mary path.


Oh yeah – I headed for the chairs.

~

I jump onto the first one and run down the entire length of the chairs, still screaming my bloody head off. I am in full fight-or-flight mode and my mother is in tears. I’m knocking stuff over and swinging out and kicking every time the nurse gets near.

As Ms. Liar tries to corner me again, she shouts for help. I think my own screaming probably summoned them sooner.

And dang if way too much help didn’t arrive.

~

Yeah, a "few" guys holding me down did the trick. Ms. Liar took 3 vials instead of the promised 2 (probably terrified that she’d never survive another draw) from a very hoarse little girl.

And when it was all done – did something that left me stunned speechless (hard to do, my friends).

“Here’s a sticker, good job!”

~
(this only even remotely qualifies as a True Story Tuesday if you know that momma raised me to be respectful of adults, and this was insanely outrageous behavior that I think kinda sorta shocked her... call it one of those "breaking point" moments)
Sooo… I know you can outdo this! Join along and share your outrageous/miraculous/amazing story!

21 comments:

Lisa said...

Tsk Tsk Tsk Mr. Daddy! I thought for sure you would have something to say about your wife's little 'adventure,' to say the least!

Poor Rachel! I am so sorry for all you went through as a child. At least you know your parents were doing all they could for you, even if that included seeing Frankenstein monsters and Stanford clinical trials! I can only imagine what that nurse was thinking! LOL

Mr. Daddy said...

Lisa, let me put a little disclaimer here...

Lets just say that Rach and another co-worker are being expanded by God's grace at work, and I would like to stretch some necks for them.
Maybe its is Gods way of expanding me too.

Any way with that and some major projects coming due at work and trying to get the front pasture fenced, Rach picked up the ball for me on the TST. (isn't she a sweetheart!)

Will try to let the work be done in all of us graciously. (yea right) and get back to the right frame of mind to share.

P.S. I still remind her every once in a while how HOT!!!! she is...LOL

Tina said...

Rachel....poor thing!

Don't you hate people that lie....just tell the truth....it may hurt alittle etc. etc.

Happy Tuesday!

Mom Of Many said...

Oh my gracious you poor thing!! But I absolutely love your flight...I'm sure everyone who heard you screaming was scarred for life, but Dw and I have a saying that pertains to lots of things...and we're proud of you for living it: Run Baby Run!! xo

brian said...

Yeah, the sticker pretty much makes up for the lies and 3-vial draw...

It's like I ALWAYS say: NEVER trust a nurse :)

momof3darlings said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! But I'm so right there with ya. I do my lamaze breathing during them. LOL

Is Mr Linky down? I dont see it...let me refresh and see if that helps...

Sarah said...

Last time I had surgery my mom kept telling the staff "Make sure you put her out in pre-op. She knows too much." The inside of an OR makes me FREAK OUT, so needles don't because it means (usually) that I'll be out cold before seeing the OR. Having a professional patient as a patient is aways harder for a doctor. We always tell them how to do their job!

He And Me + 3 said...

What I want to know is how the blood draws went during the pregnancy? LOL
I hate it too, but have gotten used to it because of my Thyroid cancer. You get blood drawn alot.
Too funny.
Sad thing is I never get a sticker.

Rachel said...

These comments are great! Thanks friends!

Lisa - Mr. Daddy was actually falling asleep as I begged him to come read the TST post.

Then when he left the comment this morning, I totally knew where he was coming from (our workplace is extremely stressfull right now - and as much as I hate to cry, he hates seeing me cry worse).

Brian - I totally cracked up at your response (by the way guys... his WIFE is wife.mom.nurse - in case you haven't checked out her fun page yet!)

Mimi, it somehow was easier during pregnancy... it was still a total act of self-discipline to sit there for a blood draw - but picturing my baby worked wonders.

Have a great TST day guys!

Elaine at Matters of the Heart) said...

That is so horrible. I wonder if the nurse telling the truth is worse. Goose always asks is it going to hurt?

Kameron said...

I have the tiniest veins in the history of the world so getting mu blood drawn is always an ordeal for me! It is the thing I hate most about pregnancy, the blood draws and the IV they insisted on sticking in me when we got to the hospital. Just in case. Of course I didn't end up needing it and as soon as I pushed him out I asked if they would take it out. Yep, you can see where my concern lies!

Stacy said...

Oh boy! Poor you! I can totally see why you have such an aversion to needles...you were definitely scarred as a kid. I was wondering what kind of clinical trial you did at Stanford.

I don't like getting my blood drawn, but its better than giving blood that either makes me faint or want to hurl. Apparently my body needs that stuff and doesn't want to give it up. I'll have to do a TST about the first time I gave blood...I just wish I had a picture to accompany it!

Shanda said...

Man, you'd think you'd at LEAST get a sucker or a balloon! ;)

I too am so sad for all that you (and your mom!) went through back then. God had His hand on you throughout it all though and I'm so glad that you not only "survived" it all; but are a beautiful woman and mother now.

I'll be the nurse never said that again!!

wife.mom.nurse said...

Now I understand the needle aversion even better! Poor kid!

Your have been through your fair share of trauma!

I'll bet your mom was pretty traumatized too.

Being a mom myself, I can only imagine how hard that was for her to bring you for tests, procedures, injections...

Wow! That was quite a TST post!

~Julie

Joye @ The Joyeful Journey said...

Oh my goodness! That's terrifying!! And I can't believe that nurse chased you! Shame, shame. Scaring a poor little girl like that...

I like your True Story Tuesday idea--sounds like fun!

Melissa said...

Wow what a story! You get me laughing all the time...sorry I mean...Have a great Wednesday!

Acceptance with Joy said...

Enjoying your true story Tuesdays... I have a story, but I couldn't post it on a Tuesday because we were in a hurry to get out of town on a Monday... but thought I would add it anyway.

Hubby is a nurse. A very good IV nurse, at that. Hope we can still be friends :-)
safords

www.homesteadblogger.com/harmonyhollow/

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