Monday, November 16, 2009

True Story Tuesday by Rachel

Can I just say True Story Tuesdays are another reason I’m glad to have made it through Mondays? :)  Y’all know what time it is… time to link up your crazy, hilarious, outrageous, miraculous, amazing and (mostly) true stories!  It can be old or brand new – just grab the code from the sidebar and enter your post.  We’ll be glad to send some linky love your way!



I Fought the Law and the… (Oh wait, I am the law)
I’ve worked in law enforcement for all of my adult life.
And I ain’t gonna tell ya how many years that’s been, cuz you’d be rubbing  my age in my face.
Let’s just say that I’m pretty much your average law-abiding citizen and that it runs in the family.
(For reals… we have something like 11 family members in various agencies.  And I’m kinda the "little-sister-mascot” of our section.  Try having 30 big brothers teasing you for 13 years.  Oh dang, I said I wasn’t gonna give that up.  Grr)
So I’m not typically a law-breaker.
Until one fateful night…
I was young and dumb and had found a new form of entertainment.
With some other juvenile delinquent friends, I’d discovered the joys of laser pointers.
No biggie, right?
Except that the three of us are hanging out trying to figure out just exactly how far this laser pointer can, ummm… point?
By way of explanation, the two accomplices were both guys – both members of the male species who still found bodily functions absolutely hilarious.  Just so you can get an overall taste of the atmosphere.
I’m not sure which idiot said, “Hey look!  You can see the laser all the way across the street!”  And I’m not gonna confirm which idiot may or may not have said, “Whoa look!  You can see it on the inside wall of the apartment a block away!”
See, you’d never think that someone would totally freak out about a random laser point appearing on their wall, right?  Especially if it was drawing circles around your clock and spelling out stuff like “R-A-C-H” – oh I mean “H-I”.
Absolutely clueless why someone would flip and feel the need to call the police.
And let’s just say that the police in our joys-of-living-in-the-city area were (ahem) mighty quick to respond.
But if that had happened, I mean, hypothetically and all, you can bet that it would have been purely coincidental that all of the lights in our house suddenly were turned off, the blinds were closed, and all occupants simultaneously found themselves behind large furniture.  It was just a well timed “Quiet Game”, right?
Until the front room lit up like the Fourth of July – red and blue lights flashing from a happenstance nearby police cruiser.
Which kinda sorta happened to be parked directly in front of the house.
Did we do something illegal?
Hold still.
Oh my gosh!
They’re knocking on the door!
What do we do?
Just be quiet!
Stay down!
Flashlight beams poked through the living room, swinging around and outlining the furniture.
It seemed like a good eleventy hundred seconds before the pounding subsided.  By then our ears were ringing and we were blue in the face from holding our breath.  We were too scared to move.
We crouched behind the furniture for a good 5 minutes longer, then the non-male idiot ventured from behind the rocking chair to peek through the blinds at the cruiser slowly pulling away.
Never before and never since have I been party to criminals eluding apprehension…
And it was infinitely funnier when shortly afterward, my mother-in-law forgot the alarm combination (1-2-3-4… yep, she forgot it), and the police responded.
To a completely dark and locked house where she crouched cowering behind the furniture.
Ironic, no?
So what are your True Story Tuesday tales?  Do share!  We’d love to come by and add some comment love!


Eve said...

Hahaha! I can totally picture that happening... to me!

Well, it sounds like you're safe to create havoc for another day! ;)

Shana Putnam said...

Now that is hilarious! I could so see myself doing that! great story! By the way I linked up the story you told me I should. but only cuz you asked

Lisa said...

So funny! Miss Cop hiding behind the furniture! LOL We've hid from neighbors and salesmand, but thankfully never the police! LOL I am still giggling......

Anonymous said...

Whew. At least you didn't blind some pilot flying overhead and cause a crash. How did they even figure out that it was you guys? Someone must have spotted you, huh? Good story for Itty Bit (with names changed to protect the innocent, of course). "I knew someone who used a laser pointer at night just playing around, and the police knew it was them and kept an eye on them forever and ever more...."

Floortime Lite Mama said...

OMG that is simply hysterical

Kmama said...

You are too good. I would have cracked under the pressure and had to answer the door! LOL

Emily said...

hahahaha! I wonder what would have happened if y'all had gotten busted.

He & Me + 3 said...

Now that was hysterical.

Stacyonthecouch said...

Now if I was in my house just minding my own business when a red light started writing things on my wall, I don't know if I could bring myself to call the police. I might just keep that incident to myself in fear that my mind had finally cracked!

That is hilarious.

Michelle Pixie said...

You are so funny! And such a rebel! Your kinda trouble with the law is about my extent of trouble with the law. I guess I had a good healthy fear of my mom's wrath to ever do anything to bad. LOL

Queen Mommy said...

Oh my goodness! That is hysterical!!

Brandi said...

OMW! FUNNY! I would have done the exact same thing!

A few relatives on hubby's side are in law enforcement. It does come in handy when you get pulled over and you work into the conversation that your grandpa is so-and-so, or your dad is so-and-so, or perhaps even your step-mom is so-and-so. Not that either of us have ever been pulled over or that, if we had been, we'd stoop to name dropping. Just sayin'... ;)

Stacy said...

At least your near criminal apprehension was something you could hide from LOL! Try hiding 3 sweaty horses on a hitching post in front of the house and pretend it wasn't you. Maybe I should write that one up for a TST, eh? ;)

Killlashandra said...

Laer pointers often lead to entertaining stories more frequently than I would ever have thought. Although normally those stories involve cats..... ;)

HeatherOz said...

That is so funny! Crazy kids!

Foursons said...

I too wonder how the heck they knew it was you guys. And what would they have done? I don't believe writing your name on someone's wall 1 block away from your location with a laser pointer is illegal. Is it? I would have been more afraid to hide then to open the door. With my luck they would have called my mom and said that I was evading arrest.

brian said...

Law breaker goes on to a successful career in the PD! Crazy!

That would be like, oh I don't know, a kid who almost got arrested by arson detectives (possession of illegal bottle rockets), who later becomes a fireman...and writer...

Mama4Real said...

That's brilliant! I love it!

Anonymous said...

LOVE the way you tell a story. That was great!

Kimberly@PrettyPinkMomma said...

I love how you implemented your technical cop lingo even when you were referring to yourself! Thanks for stopping by my blog!

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