Monday, May 31, 2010

True Story Tuesday - Because this stuff only happens to me

It’s True Story Tuesday!

Time to dust off those family legends that are just dying to be memorialized in a blog post and shared with the world!  You’ve probably already got a post that qualifies: something amazing, hilarious, outrageous, miraculous and (mostly) true that has happened to you!

So grab the code underneath the TST button the right sidebar, paste it in your post somewhere, then come back and link up for some comment love!

This week brought to you by the girl who lovingly sacrifices her physical wellbeing for your entertainment…

~

BECAUSE THIS STUFF ONLY HAPPENS TO ME

 

That man of mine.

Let’s just say that once I beautified Ella, my husband was very, very unwilling to be caught using my camera.

(Yes, I named my camera.  She’s special to me.  And I don’t have a little girl to dote on.  Come on Mr. Daddy!!!)

See, she wears this pretty little strap from Priddy Creations:

camera strap

And the man, shockingly, refuses to carry her anywhere.

Which means that when he got his new phone and realized that the camera was much better than his previous phone… the man has become a picture-taking machine.

~

This leads me to a few evenings ago.

Scene:  Rachel is folding freshly laundered towels in the bathroom.

You know… after cooking a gourmet dinner, entertaining 16 dinner guests with her witty banter, sewing new curtains for the living room, polishing the silver, planting a vegetable garden, making organic soap, completing a 2-hour workout, reading 27 chapters of the Bible, and teaching Itty Bit the quadratic equation.

What?  Okay, it was only 2 chapters of the Bible.

Anyway… so I’m folding towels.

And that man and his blasted phone/camera/weapon popped around the doorframe and startled me.

Instinctively, I shielded my perfectly made-up tired face from the flash and shrieked.

The man grinned and continued to aim that obnoxious little shutter at me while I hurriedly unfolded 15 towels in an attempt to grab one to block the horrendous photo he was sure to capture otherwise.

 

He would not stop cracking up.  Yes my dears, this is the exact expression:

IMG_6681

 

After the shrieking to no avail thing didn’t work within 30 seconds, I’d finally had enough.

I was gonna kick that man’s butt.

Literally.

 

And friends, let me tell ya.  When you’re holding a full length towel in front of you, make sure that it’s not obstructing your view of any potential obstacles.

Cuz usually when I end up with feet like on the left, it’s because of what’s on the right:

Paloma Herrera

And instead, I took a mighty swing and kicked THROUGH the towel toward my laughing husband’s rear-end.

And I kicked straight into the open cabinet door.

OUCH!!!

 

Oh, but it wouldn’t be a TRUE True Story Tuesday without that little something extra, right?

 

So I kick the cabinet door hard enough that my brain is convinced that I have broken two toes…

and the cabinet door bites back.

 

I.kid.you.not.

 

That thing swung back hard and roundly clocked my OPPOSITE knee – sending me to the floor howling in pain.

 

Would you believe that I kicked high enough that my foot was midair when the cabinet swung to retaliate?  So the blasted thing ended up between my legs by the time I realized my ballet training was far more harmful than helpful?

 

See, I have:

two busted toes on my left foot

an instantaneous gnarly bruise on my right knee.

a cabinet door that no longer closes.

and a husband that unfortunately witnessed the entire thing.

 

(and whose first words were TRUE STORY TUESDAAAAAY!  Is he trained or what?!?)

 

~

Who does this?!?  Tell me I’m not alone!  Got any crazy true stories that need some comment love?  Link ‘em up below and we’ll be around to enjoy them with you!

~

25 comments:

Allenspark Lodge said...

It's an... interesting ... state of affairs when we start looking forward to bad things happening so we can blog about them. Do you remember how humiliated and angry you would have been as a kid if someone had read your diary/journal? What have we become? Man, I LOVE IT! You got pics, right Mr D?
Bill

Shana said...

Oh my gosh Rachel. you are one prone to injury gal lol. I am so sorry about your bruised body and ego :). I am completely sure that Mr. Daddy will be paying for this right? And when he does I am sure it will make TST also. Can't wait for that one!!

Angie said...

And here I was thinking that I was the most accident prone person in the world! ;) I hope you are doing good. And thanks for the painful reminder of my ballet training days. I actually remember the painful feet.

Mr. Daddy said...

OK DEAR!!!! and friends, You really know that it is only MOSTLY true RIGHT....

And not entirely how I remember it...

Maybe next Tuesday, I should post my own version????

what do you think?

Rachel said...

Good Lord Man... don't make threats like that on my blog!

Mr. Daddy said...

Threats DEAR????

Not me...*snicker*
I'm sure your readers would love the ressssssssssssstttt of the story...

BBWwaaaaaHHhaaaaaaaa........

Rachel said...

Oh you WOULDN'T...

I mean, unless you really wanted me to wait until you were asleep to have you model the lovely REPLACEMENT mineral foundation and bronzer, right?

I mean... with Ella as a witness? :)

Kmama said...

Only you is so true! However, you aren't the only one that was wounded this weekend. The engine hatch on our friends boat was propped up and when it was "let down", both Jdaddy and I had our feet under it. The thing came down on both of our big toes. Mine is okay (but sore), but Jdaddy's immediately turned blue and purple. He had to drill a hole in his nail yesterday to finally relieve the pressure. That just grosses me out.

I hope your toes heal quickly!! Ouch!

Allenspark Lodge said...

Rach,
We dare NOT let Mr. Daddy and Bill get together! I see that look alot around here, too.

Take care of yourself, lady. We want you in good riding condition when you get here this summer. We are putting miles on the trails now.
Juanita

Foursons said...

Hahaha- I love that his first words were "True Story Tuesday!" I can't tell you how many times that has come out of my mouth! Unfortunately, that didn't happen this last week and I am scrambling for a story. I'm workin' on it though. Thinkin' hard right now. Problem is...it kinda' hurts.

Tiffany said...

Ok, please tell me those are not your actual feet, injured from ballet? Cause that is not helping me want to sign the girlies up for lessons AT ALL!!! And Mr. Daddy - I would love to hear your version (sorry Rach - I've picked on him enough lately - gotta show him some love).

Mr. and Mrs. Nurse Boy said...

Seriously? You can't even make that up! That sounds like something that would happen to me. Every time I try to get back at Nurse Boy, it seems to back fire. It makes me so mad. ;0)

Mrs. NB

Michelle said...

Do these things ever happen to Mr. Daddy? I'm starting to think that he arranges these things just so you have TST to tell! :)

Heather said...

I a sorry about your injuries!!

HeatherOz said...

Hahaha! Sorry you were hurt but thanks for the comedy! Apparantly only you AND Kmama! Man! My toe hurts from reading about JDaddy drilling his toe!

Pam D said...

*sigh* so now you see why I no longer particpate? It's just too painful.... lol! Really... when my boy was in the midst of risky behavior and I considered pushing him over the edge (literally) just so I could get a good post, I knew it was time to stop the madness. Cause really, I could never, EVER top you... so I'll just enjoy vicariously. Hoping, of course, that your knees and toes (and head and shoulders, too!) are OK...

City girl turned Country Girl said...

OMGosh!!! You seriously are not alone!!! Last year my Hubby was harassing me in the kitchen so I pretended like I was gonna kick him and he says "your gonna break your toe, your gonna break your toe"!! Taunting me, right?! So what did I do?...I kicked as hard as I could and that chicken jumped onto the counter so I therefore slammed my foot into my solid oak cabinet! Yep broke me big toe BAD!! I even had my tennis shoe on! So f course I couldn't hardly let him know that I'd hurt me LOL!! So I promptly scurry to the bedroom and cover my *ouch words and whatnots* in my pillow! I told him about 3 hours later...And yep he laughed!! I told him he needed to be a man and take the kicking next time LOL!!

Hope you heal up soon!!!

Beth said...

Trust me Rachel ... you are NOT alone! And I can't wait for the evidence when you and Ella get pay backs!

TheRixonFive said...

Oh My Gosh. That man of yours needs his butt kicked. =) WHY do they think these shenanigans are funny?

Judy Sheldon-Walker said...

Rachel, I'm not laughing, because I have done things very similar. It's nice to be hurt AND laughed at!

Stacy said...

*sigh* Yes, Rachel...this seems to only happen to you!

I did get a massive bruise on my knee from just getting into my Acadia too enthusiastically, so I guess I'm not exactly the most graceful either. ;)

Lexie Loo & Dylan Too said...

Only you, my friend, only you. And, well, me. Because I'm accident prone. I hope your toes feel better!

Crystal @ Semi-Crunchy Mama said...

Yeouch! I'm wincing with sympathy pains here! Between your story itself, and the photo of the poor, ballet-beaten feet... Again, yeouch! (Please tell me that wasn't a photo of your feet. Please tell me this was a stock photo. Puh-lease...)

Love the back-and-forth between you & Mr. Daddy in the comments! (Sounds like you might want to consider stealthily changing the password on your blog before next week's True Story Tuesday!)

He & Me + 3 said...

I hate that type of chain reactions. I did that with my car door. Opened it up...stuff started to fall out, kicked my foot up to stop them from falling out because things were already in my hands and kicked the door instead of the things. Bruise and everything fell to the ground. See similar stories. LOL

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