Tuesday, February 15, 2011

The Deaf Dental Patient

If you’re joining along for our little ride through what day-to-day life might be like for a deaf person… we started at The Deaf Mommy.  And now due to the rather stinkbutt comments on Facebook begging Mr. Daddy to dish the dirt on his anesthetized wifey, I bring you my attempt to minimize the damage:  The Deaf Dental Patient!

(Yes, STINKBUTT… I have no idea where Itty Bit gets that?)

It started with a fatal mistake by Mr. Daddy:  not logging out of Facebook.

It culminated in a thoughtful status update:

vow

I thought it was a lovely gesture.  Especially considering that he was driving at the time that it was posted.

And then… some familiar names jumped into it:

image

Daaaaannnnnaaaaaaa!!!  I thought you were my friend?!

 

vow2

Julieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!  What did I do you you?

vow2

GunDivaaaaaaaa, Aunt Craaaazyyyyy – y’all are ganging up on me!!!

vow3

Briaaaaaaaaaaaaaannnnn!!!  Don’t encourage him!

 

So because I know Mr. Daddy would have made this far more embarrassing, let me just fill y’all in:

I had a root canal.

An ouchie one.

After declaring that my last toothache was worse than an epidural-free childbirth (because I know what that feels like), and worse than kidney stones (because I know what that feels like), and was the worst pain the world (because I now knew what THAT felt like), I skipped the visit to Urgent Care and readily agreed to a repeat root canal.

(Let’s just say that the last trip to Urgent Care may or may not have included a nurse who thought I was drug-seeking until she saw the blood pressure jump from 110/70 to 156/104.  Fun times…)

Anyhoo (that word bugs me), I packed my would-rather-have-a-baby-without-drugs-while-having-kidney-stones hurting butt into the car and headed to the specialist.  They outfitted me with the lovely paper bib and swaddled me with a blanket (cuz YEESH it was cold in there).

Deaf challenge #1:  Then the dentist and assistant both donned these lovely accessories:

dentist mask

Lipreading anyone?

They threw one of those lovely cheek retractors in my mouth and took some x-rays.  They left the heavy lead apron thingie on me.  (This is important for later, there’ll be a test).

Then they decided to numb me up.

Remember my TST about requiring an entire medical unit to hold me down for a shot?

I kinda sorta felt like yelling my head off and breaking free to run across the lobby chairs again…

I grinned and bore it (well, I kinda sorta had to – with that cheek retractor and all) as this monster came at me four times.

dentist syringe

 

(Of course, it was seventeen times larger in real life)

Knowing that y’all were rooting for some blogworthy stuff from Mr. Daddy, I bailed on the offer for nitrous oxide… I have no idea what kind of True Story Tuesdays are lurking in my anesthetized mind…

I was doing awesome through the ensuing drilling – trying not to gag on all the hardware in my mouth and thinking happy thoughts… when I saw it.

Saw what?

The in-process x-ray of what a root canal looks like on film:

root canal

Oh Lordy… those super-sharp pins that they screw into your tooth that lead back to NERVES.

I had stuck it out for nearly an hour and I finally felt nauseous.  And that lead apron thingie?  Folded double on my bladder.

I was terrified to move… knowing that I could accidently bump one of those sharp thingies somewhere where it ought not to go.  (Seriously you guys, as accident-prone as I am, swallowing one of those weapons…)

The lead apron thingie was making it hard for me to pull my arms out to attempt any kind of clumsy pantomime.  And how exactly do you say, “I have to go pee”?  It was driving me absolutely nuts as a deaf person who can sign… trying to figure that one out.

There was finally a split second without drilling and I desperately mumbled,

Can I yyyyoooos duh bafroooom?

(with drool, lots and lots of drool)

As quickly as I was sprung from my lead blanket trap, I scooted to the nearby ladies room.

And nearly screamed at the woman in the mirror.

cheek retractor

 

Heck yeah.

I rushed back after scrubbing my fingers raw and trying not to touch anything… keeping my mind away from the thoughts of anything in the bathroom contaminating my forced-open mouth.

GAG.

And I’m home now.  Happily reporting that absolutely nothing blogworthy happened.

Well, except for my nursemaid falling asleep on the couch and Itty Bit deciding that he needed some naptime company…

IMG_0266

See, nothing blogworthy ;)

 

 

By the way… 50,000 OnceUponAMiracle points to the first person who answers where the nickname on Mr. Daddy’s Facebook post came from :)

47 comments:

Heather said...

Everything in your life is blogworthy. Aaaaand I searched way back in OUAM's archives to discover (I think) that the nickname comes from a TST post Lisa at Our Life with Dylan? DO I WIN???I need these points.

Foursons said...

It has to do w/a post you wrote w/a picture of Mr. D as a young lad lookin' all hot and someone or other commented on the hot guy in the picture. Right?!

Glad you're OK. And oh so glad you got that shot of Mr. D and his sleepmate! Bwhahahahahaha.

I would have been freaking about walking into a bathroom with my mouth forced open that wide. Not a place for a germaphobe that's for sure.

And for the record, you know I'm always trying to help you out w/good blog fodder! My comment was in all the name of being a good friend. :)

HeatherOz said...

OH, I'm so sorry to laugh, but thinking about you walking around with your mouth pried open like that is more than I can handle! Did you scare any of the other patients? :0

Together We Save said...

Oh my goodness... that sounds so painful!!

Transparent Mama said...

I love that he posted that on FB. So hilarious. Great to meet you.

GunDiva said...

Rockin' Hot Magnum Daddy - came from the post when someone said he looked like Tom Sellek.

Of course, I was sure of it until I typed it.

I've been putting off going to the dentist, but I lost one of my root canal fillings and ingnored it long enough that the back part of my tooth flaked off. I just hate the dentist so much that I seriously considered just yanking the darn thing and being gap-toothed.

Hope your mouth feels better :)

Shana said...

I am so happy that there wasn't anything blogworthy...ahem, in your opinion anyway lol. Although, that pic of Mr Daddy is pretty sweet ;) I am seriously happy you got your tooth fixed though.

Buckeroomama said...

Uh, that might or might not do some serious damage to Mr. Daddy's huntin' macho image. Just saying. ;p

Ugh. Those images make me promise to brush my teeth the full two minutes that the dentists recommend! I don't ever want to experience what you just described.

Kmama said...

I never even thought about the "mouth wide open" and bathroom contaminants. ICK!!

I don't know how dentists and hygienists do it. I could never spend all day in other people's mouths.

I'm glad nothing too blogworthy came from it!

Brandi said...

Oh dear lawd. My teeth are itching. You totally lost me at 'root canal.' I read the rest of the post, but 'root canal' is now etched on my brain. I super duper need to go to the dentist... like haven't been in coughsixcoughyearscoughorsocough, but I'm (BOCK BOCK) a BIG chicken!

Glad you survived! And, the pic of Mr. Daddy? LOL! Are you sure Itty did that? ;)

Furry Bottoms said...

icccccck!! I had a root canal once and I absolutely hate those tents with the mouth retractors.

This post was hilarious :)

Angie Vik said...

So funny - you're a good storyteller, but also scary because I have a boatload of dental work that needs done. Thanks for the heads up. I'll make sure to use the bathroom first.

Tiffany said...

Hmm... I wonder how much bribery it would take to get Mr. D (aka Tom Sellick, although GunDiva beat me to it) to share his side of the story.... I know a place with really tasty cookies...

Amy said...

Well, the last dentist visit I had was pretty good.... but now I am TERRIFIED to go back! Honey you should have just taken the laughing gas and enjoyed the ride! LOL

Your gift for story telling makes me super jealous! Genius lady, pure genius!

Hope your mouth is better!

tattytiara said...

Ah hahaha, beware the blogging wife with a camera! And

whywhywhywhywhywhywhy did I look at that x-ray?

OW.

Heal fast and well!

Melissa said...

You never cease to crack me up girl, oh poor mr daddy! I can just imagine the revenge he's conjuring up for you Rachel, I'm not so sure I'd be going to sleep near him! Love you girl!

Beth Zimmerman said...

I'm beyond hurt that we are not Facebook Friends! :( It may even hurt more than your jaw!

Now let me tell you how very much I love you (not so you'll feel bad or anything)! I read this whole post (graphic pictures and all) even though I have a SEVERE dental phobia and I will probably have nightmares now!

Sniff. Sniff.

Saimi said...

Oh my Gosh, if going to the Dentist isn't bad enough your so called friends are joking about it o Facebook! Evil pure evil!!

Glad you survived...you might have to defriend so people though! Ha!

TheRixonFive said...

Oh, I'm howling! =) And not only at your expense. That picture of Mr. Daddy with his "lovies" -- er, I mean Itty bit's lovies--is too hysterical. Nice one!

Lexie Loo & Dylan Too said...

I absolutely love your stories! I hope that you're feeling better. I fear the dentist!

Kameron said...

Hahahaah! Not blogworthy at all! It is wierd seing your mouth all open like that. it really can be used as a torture device!

Killlashandra said...

I'm sorry. But I have to get a crown and now your scaring me and I can hear. Lol

lifebythecreek said...

Oh my word. I am so TICKED that we were in the hospital with Adam when this all went down. BEcause you KNOW I would have jumped on that like a frog on a lilypad. gaaaah. And I am STILL laughing at that stock photo of the chick with her mouth pried open. I have so been there, and it is just so ugly. LOVED this! sorry to have missed the party... and GLAD that it's all over and you feel better!

Kara said...

You. Crack. Me. Up.

That's all I have to say. Thanks for sharing the story!

Blackjohn john said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Alex Stephen said...

I wanted to thank you for this epic paragraph .I for sure favored every little bit of it. I have you bookmarked your web site to look at the latest stuff you add.
best dentist in oakville

Hua Cai said...

cheap jordans
chanel handbags
michael kors handbags
links of london
coach outlet
mont blanc outlet
true religion outlet, http://www.truereligionjeansoutlet.com
true religion jeans, http://www.truereligionjeansoutlet.com
calvin klein underwear
asics running shoes
new york jets jerseys
abercrombie and fitch
cheap soccer jerseys
philadelphia eagles jerseys
foamposite gold
karen millen uk
nike running shoes
air force 1 shoes
lebron james shoes
herve leger
ugg boots, http://www.cheapuggboots.net.co
polo ralph lauren outlet
roshe run men
giuseppe zanotti outlet
converse all star
insanity
louis vuitton outlet
michael kors outlet online
hermes belt
new york knicks jersey
michael kors canada, http://www.michaelkorsoutletcanada.in.net
barcelona jersey
michael kors outlet online
designer handbags,handbags outlet,cheap handbags,purses and handbags,wholesale handbags,designer bags,bags outlet,handbags wholesale,cheap purses,discount handbags,handbags sale,wholesale purses,handbags and purses,designer purses
adidas outlet
2015817caihuali

Junda Xu said...

20151027 junda
coach factory outlet
nfl jerseys
Gucci Outlet Online Sale
Abercrombie T-Shirts
hollister clothing store
ugg boots
michael kors outlet
Michael Kors Outlet Handbags Factory Price
ugg boots
toms outlet
abercrombie
mont blanc
michael kors outlet
michael kors outlet
Coach Outlet Store Online Shop
canada goose outlet
michael kors outlet
Abercrombie and Fitch Outlet Sale
Louis Vuitton Bags Outlet Store
michael kors bags
Wholesale Authentic Designer Handbags
ugg outlet store
air max 95,nike golf,nike janoski,air max 1,nike canada,nike plus,nike shox,nike factory store
michael kors handbag
Louis Vuitton Handbags For Cheap
cheap ugg boots
Christian Louis Vuitton Red Bottoms
coach outlet store online
true religion outlet
canada goose jackets

Fangyaya said...

fangyanting20151029
oakley sunglasses wholesale
ugg sale
the north face
tiffany jewellery
ray ban sunglasses
the north face clearance
oakley sunglasses
true religion jeans
hermes bags
ray ban sunglasses
michael kors handbags
lululemon outlet
cheap mlb jerseys
oakley sunglasses
cheap nba jerseys
air max 2015
north face jackets
hermes birkin
chanel handbags
true religion outlet
michael kors outlet
oakley sunglasses wholesale
ray ban sunglasses
toms outlet
michael kors handbags
links of london
canada goose jackets
mcm outlet
timberland boots
coach outlet

柯云 said...

2016-03-18keyun
gucci outlet
coach outlet
kate spade
cheap jordan shoes
louis vuitton handbags
jordan concords
coach factorty outlet online
hollister outlet
adidas originals
michael kors outlet
toms shoes
coach factory outlet
louis vuitton outlet stores
ralph lauren outlet
kevin durant basketball shoes
polo ralph lauren outlet
louis vuitton uk
jeremy scott shoes
kate spade handbags
jordan 6
tods outlet online
abercrombie outlet
ugg outlet
louis vuitton
oakley sunglasses
ray ban sunglasses
fitflops sale clearance
coach outlet online
lebron 13
designer handbags
kate spade
ugg boots
nike blazers
longchamp bags
michael kors outlet online
michael kors outlet
michael kors outlet
beats by dr dre
michael kors uk

林磊 said...

2016-3-21 leilei
burberry
louboutin
bottega veneta
canada goose jackets
michael kors bags
nike force 1
michael kors outlet
michael kors outlet online
coach outlet online
true religion
michael kors outlet online
nike air max 95
babyliss pro
oakley store
adidas superstars
toms outlet
canada goose uk
ray ban sunglasses
ugg sale
longchamp
timberland boots
chi flat iron
nike cortez shoes
coach factory outlet
toms shoes
calvin klein outlet
mcm handbags
jordan pas cher
air max
prada uk
michael kors outlet
louis vuitton pas cher
converse sale
michael kors outlet
ray bans
jordan shoes
michael kors
nike store uk
reebok classic
louboutin outlet

xumeiqing said...

2016523meiqing
hollister shirts
kate spade outlet
michael kors outlet
gucci outlet
coach outlet
michael kors handbags
cheap oakley sunglasses
abercrombie and fitch
louis vuitton handbags
chi flat iron
coach outlet online
adidas superstar
ray ban outlet
nike air force white
nike huarache white
prada sunglasses
true religion
birkenstock sandals
oakley sunglasses,oakley sunglass,cheap oakley sunglasses,oakley sunglasses cheap,oakley sunglasses outlet,oakley store,oakley outlet,oakley outlet store,oakley sunglasses sale,oakley sunglasses discount
sac longchamp
michael kors outlet online
hollister clothing
nike free runs
rolex watches
louis vuitton factory outlet
cheap ferragamo shoes
coach outlet
www.coachfactory.com
sac longchamp pliage
reebok shoes
michael kors outlet online
christian louboutin outlet
basketball shoes
adidas shoes uk
ray ban sunglasses
longchamp outlet

raybanoutlet001 said...

true religion store
michael kors outlet store
oakley vault
michael kors handbags
jordans for cheap
tiffany online
nike huarache
jordan shoes on sale
cheap jerseys from china
tiffany and co jewellery
chrome hearts online
michael kors handbags clearance
air jordans,cheap air jordans,air jordan shoes,air jordan 11,air jordan 13,air jordan 6,air jordan 4
true religion jeans
nike kobe sneakers
oakley sunglasses
yeezy boost 350
adidas yeezy uk
tiffany and co jewellery
yeezy boost 350
mlb jerseys authentic
oakley store online
nike air zoom structure 19
kobe basketball shoes
adidas nmd
cheap nfl jerseys

dong dong23 said...

polo ralph lauren
canada goose sale
burberry outlet
adidas yeezy
hollister clothing
washington wizards jerseys
timberland outlet
louis vuitton paris
ray ban sunglasses
coach outlet
canada goose uk
uggs for cheap
ray ban sunglasses
jordan shoes
michael kors outlet clearance
mont blanc pens
uggs sale
uggs outlet
louis vuitton
kate spade handbags
ugg boots
ugg boots uk
ralph lauren
red bottom shoes
chaussures christian louboutin
coach factory outlet
true religion jeans
coach outlet
boston celtics jerseys
ugg uk
toms shoes
fitflops
ugg boots
michael kors
moncler uk
nba jerseys
golden state warriors jerseys
ugg boots
ugg boots
michael kors handbags
20169.9wengdongdong

raybanoutlet001 said...

pandora charms
polo ralph lauren
chaussure louboutin pas cher
nike blazer pas cher
nike trainers uk
christian louboutin shoes
michael kors handbags
salomon boots
michael kors uk
converse shoes

xumeiqing said...

20161012meiqing
louis vuitton canada
oakley sunglasses outlet
toms shoes outlet
michael kors outlet online
coach factory outlet
cheap uggs
michael kors outlet
fitflops sale clearance
ugg boots
gucci outlet

chenlina said...

louis vuitton uk
nike air max uk
tory burch handbags
michael kors outlet
ralph lauren outlet
fitflops
louis vuitton
louis vuitton
ray ban wayfarer
hollister clothing
chenlina20170215

chenmeinv0 said...

coach outlet online
nike roshe run 3
adidas outlet store
cheap jordans
burberry scarf
levi's jeans
michael kors outlet online
celine outlet
coach outlet store online
coach outlet store online
2017.2.28xukaimin

raybanoutlet001 said...

redskins jerseys
replica watches
gucci borse
michael kors outlet
eagles jerseys
hollister clothing
packers jerseys
saints jerseys
jordan shoes
2017.3.6

Unknown said...

san diego chargers jerseys
nike air force 1
giants jersey
washington redskins jerseys
hugo boss sale
michael kors outlet
the north face outlet
replica rolex
nike huarache trainers
hugo boss
20170322

chenmeinv0 said...

adidas originals
cheap nhl jerseys
adidas nmd
coach factory online
kate spade outlet
michael kors handbags
coach factory
calvin klein
new balance
cheap oakley sunglasses
2017.4.1xukaimin

Unknown said...

michael kors uk
raiders jerseys
hugo boss
jordan shoes
coach outlet
ugg outlet
oakley sunglasses wholesale
ralph lauren outlet
michael kors handbags outlet
kobe 9
20170415

龙大猫 said...

lebron 14 shoes
fitflops
cheap jordans
nike roshe run
michael kors outlet
nike air huarache
nike zoom
kyrie 3 shoes
adidas ultra boost
michael kors handbags

xumeiqing said...

20170527meiqing
louboutin outlet
adidas trainers
discount oakley sunglasses
nike blazer low pas cher
ralph lauren sale
nike air max 95
ray bans
cheap jordan shoes
coach outlet store
adidas yeezy boost 350

adidas nmd said...

ray ban sunglasses outlet
true religion outlet
nike trainers uk
ugg outlet
michael kors outlet
ugg outlet
baltimore ravens jerseys
ralph lauren
fitflops
ugg boots

GIL BERT said...

ugg outlet
ugg boots
christian louboutin
adidas nmd runner
cheap oakley sunglasses
cheap oakley sunglasses
michael kors handbags
ugg outlet
ray ban sunglasses outlet
washington redskins jerseys

happy 123 said...

michael kors uk
michael kors outlet
ugg outlet
ugg outlet
adidas nmd
nike factory outlet
nike outlet
nike roshe
ugg boots
mlb jerseys
20170812