Monday, March 07, 2011

True Story Tuesday - The One My Mom Doesn't Want Me To Blog

True Story Tuesday is BACK!

Really, it’s all about you!  We’ve all got those family legends that crack us up with every retelling, or leave us amazed that we survived something so crazy.  And what’s better than sharing those favorites?  (Getting comments on them, that’s what :)

If you’ve got something outrageous, amazing, miraculous, hilarious and (mostly) true that has happened to you, just copy the code underneath the True Story Tuesday button on the right sidebar, paste it into your post, then come back and link up for some comment love!

This week brought to you by yours truly.  Whose mother just looked at her tonight and said, “oh honey, aren’t you ever going to forgive me for that?”  Which of course, made the story even better for y’all!

~

 

THE ONE MY MOTHER DOESN’T WANT ME TO BLOG

I grew up with some pretty awesome parents.  Let me apologize to my mom in advance for sharing this – but it truly gives me hope that all parents just have those moments…

Once upon a time I got asked out to prom.  (Don’t act so shocked y’all).

Growing up in a Christian home, this meant a double date with a curfew.  I happily agreed and skipped out in my lovely 1990’s dress.

(Have mercy – it looked better a couple decades ago)

prom

Don’t you love the uni-leg look?  And the frizzy hair?

Yeah, the hair.  My mom got a wee bit miffed that I’d trashed my curls and let my friend french braid my hair on the way to the dance.  But I had to.

Cuz the dude was driving his mom’s brand new Eclipse.

With the window down.

Yeah.

eclipse

Which really doesn’t have anything to do with the story.

Oh, and that dude?  You might recognize Murkatroid from the frosting wars with my sister?  Yeah, those two are like the siblings they never had.

IMG_9740

Which doesn’t really have anything to do with the story either.  But now you know the players…

So we head to the prom, pretend like we know how to dance, then join up with a group to head out for ice cream.

A quick call to the folks to assure them we’d make the midnight curfew and were with a bunch of Seniors at Denny’s (which usually hosts a different type of Senior crowd, no?)

Back in the Eclipse and heading home before I turn into a pumpkin, we are in time to beat the curfew.

 

My tuxedoed date walks me to the door, where I jam my key in and stare in puzzlement at the door as it refuses to budge.

I quickly realize that my parents have locked the deadbolt.

Which I don’t have a key for.

 

Knock

Knock Knock

(Should we knock louder?)

KNOCK KNOCK

(Should we ring the doorbell?)

DING DONG

DING DONG

DING DONG

KNOCK KNOCK

 

Suddenly I start to wonder why my light-sleeper parents are not coming to the door?  There’s no way they can’t hear the ruckus at the porch!

 

So Little Miss Priss heads to the side of the house, and by the light of the Eclipse, finds a rusty oil barrel to roll underneath the garage window.

barrel

Oh wait… y’all remember I was in my PROM DRESS and HEELS, right?

 

I climb atop the oil barrel in those dadgum heels and realize that sliding the window open is gonna be even trickier than I thought.  Cuz the darn thing is BROKEN.

As in broken glass.

broken window

My parents could be dying of carbon monoxide poisoning inside the house… I gotta get in!

I climb from the RUSTY OIL BARREL, through the BROKEN GLASS, in my PROM DRESS, in my HEELS (on my UNI-LEG, remember?)

Let’s all take a moment to reflect on that act of stupidity bravery that shall never be repeated.

(I would probably climb on another rusty oil barrel, probably go through broken glass, hopefully wear another size zero dress, but there’s an awesome possibility that I will NEVER wear heels again.  Word :)

 

Anyhoo, I pick my way through the dark garage, arm outstretched, key in the other hand.  I crash into several things, and trip repeatedly.  I am the loudest kid trying to sneak INTO her house ever.

I find the doorknob and jiggle the key into it.

The door swings open and I am greeted by this:

Bat

 

Well, actually, it was my MOM wielding a flashlight – so it looked more like this:

batmom

Except she wasn’t smiling.

And she didn’t have impressive chest hair.

Don’t you love my rocking photo editing skilz?

 

I screamed.

She sucked in a big gulp of air and slowly relaxed her Come To Jesus Meeting stance.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN THERE?

 

So she didn’t hear the car come up.

She didn’t hear the key in the front door.

She didn’t hear the knocking.

Or the doorbell ringing.

She didn’t hear the rolling of the oil barrel.

Or the multitude of garage items I knocked over.

But by golly, she heard a key in the garage door and SOMEBODY’S TRYING TO BREAK IN!

 

I think we both looked at eachother in shock for a moment… until I gained some measure of righteous indignity.

You didn’t wait up?

You locked me out?

You wouldn’t answer the door?

You were gonna hit me with a flashlight?

 

Mom, I love you.  Somehow that story makes me feel a whole lot better about my own parenting adventures :)

And I’m sorry for that picture.  But I bet you laughed.  And maybe peed a little bit?

 

~

And now it’s your turn?  Any blogworthy stories that your own childhood has created?  Join in below and we’ll be around for some comment love!


 
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28 comments:

Jami Nato said...

hahahaha! oh the stories i could tell...

thanks for your sweet comment. means a lot. :)

Foursons said...

Bwhahahahaha. You know? I'm really impressed that you did it all on one leg. You've got mad talent my friend.

And you photo editing skilz rock. I mean really- just look at that prom photo! :D

Kmama said...

That is hilarious!! The uni-leg thing had me cracking up!!

I love that they set a curfew for you and then went to bed. Sounds like something my parents would do!

trooppetrie said...

I love it and I love that you encourage me to do this every week

Tara G. said...

I think it's remarkable that the boy had larger hair than you for a 90's prom!!!

Allenspark Lodge said...

As I was reading, I wondered to myself "Why isn't her dated doing the B&E", but after finishing the story, I realized it was probably just as well. She'd a'killed him.

FUNNY!

Bill

Susan said...

Ooooh, Lordy! I should have relieved myself of my coffee overload before I read this! Too, too funny, Rachel! Your photo editing skills are hilarious—I will always think of your mom with that crazy chest hair from now on. I'm so glad she didn't whop you earlier with the flashlight, but you might want to watch over your shoulder for a bit til she forgets about the chest hair incident.

Mom of M&Ms said...

WORD!

Furry Bottoms said...

You were so totally styling in that dress and those heels!! :)

I can't believe your parents DID NOT WAIT UP!!! BUT, this also could be testament of how much they trusted you. SO that could be interpreted as a good thing.

STILL, to be locked out like that, ha ha ha I'm sorry!!

K- floortime lite mama said...

OMG i love the story
and you look soooo cute and pretty then and are even prettier now

Michelle Pixie said...

Oh that is a riot! I can't wait to hear how you mom reacts. Lovin' the chest hair!!

kc said...

thanks for the laugh!!!

Tiffany said...

hehehe....

snort....

ROFL!!! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

Sorry Mama, I tried to contain it. Didn't work well.

There are so many comments swirling in my mind right now, but I keep getting distracted by the GIANT black bow in your hair. Cause I totally had those too. Although I wasn't rocking them in high school... ahem... ;)

GunDiva said...

I do love your mom :)

Emmy said...

Wait why was the window broken? Glad she didn't hit you.

Lexie Loo & Dylan Too said...

That is so funny! I can't stop laughing at the edited picture of your mom!

Kara said...

Ohmygosh. There are just so many things I love about your blog, and they are all here in this post. This story had me rolling! LOVED IT!

Anonymous said...

Gotta love the dresses from the 90's...

myletterstoemily said...

ha ha!!! that is a hilarious story and would have
made a great episode on "happy days." i can
imagine your epitaph, "she looked just adorable
until her mom flashlighted her."

Saimi said...

You my dear are a riot, must have gotten it from your mother...I mean really, breaking windows and climbing through glass in a prom dress... only to be greeted by a mom ready to swing a flashlight...dang girl, I want to party with you!

Melissa said...

Your so fun!

Shana said...

Hahaha, how funny! I have a story kind of like that but not. I snuck out (again..I know, shame on me) and this time they locked me out on purpose. Sweet right? I had to sit at our door till morning, because I was stubborn and was NOT going to beg to be let in. So in the morning when they left to go to work (yes they kept it locked that long on purpose) I just said excuse me when they opened the door and went it and straight upstairs like nothing was wrong, got ready for school and walked right back out to the bus stop like I didn't have a care in the world while they stood there in shock. When I got home, I found out there was a care in the world and also nails in my window and deadbolts with keys to get out and in the doors and nothing but my clothes and my bed in my room and an order to write a 5 page essay on why sneaking out was dangerous. Yeah it sucked.

Lady Old Soul said...

Oh lordy, I was ROLLING! That story was hysterical! xD I thought your prom dress was actually really cute!! =)

Stacy said...

Love the hair and the prom dress...oh how it brings back memories LOL! Yeah, open windows have never done any wonders to anyone's hair.

Buckeroomama said...

Ugh! The one picture I want to see won't download for me! I've been having some problems with photos downloading on certain sites (most sites, really!) these past 2 days. :(

You bet I'm coming back when the problem's fixed just to see how you looked in your prom dress. =)

Beth Zimmerman said...

Your mom is just so precious! :) Even with chest hair and a big scary flashlight!

Lisa said...

Okay, seriously, the "Uni-leg" has left me in stitches. I can just see you hopping around hopelessly! LOLOL I am officially 'caught up' on your blog now. And the icing picture is pretty darn near priceless.

Julie said...

ahahaha!!! :D

I have a story like that too...only it was my brother who locked me out. For some reason the bus schedule was messed up, so the busses LEFT the high school 2 minutes before they let us out after exams. (Great planning, huh?!) It was the last day of school. Dad was working, can't remember where mom was, but she wasn't home. My sister and I started walking. She was sick with a nasty cold, so we decided to trade shoes and I changed into a pair of gyms shorts she had in her bag and started running home to get my car. (don't remember why I didn't have that at school either...) 9 MILES LATER I finally get home AND MY BROTHER WOULDN'T OPEN THE DOOR!!!!!!!!! lol! We laugh about it now. And I love him. ahhh!