Monday, May 23, 2011

True Story Tuesday–Waiver Schmaiver

 

Y’all remember how I got beat up by housecleaning last week, right?

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(Somebody save me from my illustrative skills)

 

You’d think I could finally take it easy and recover from my injuries, no?

 

(If you’re new here, the answer is NO.  Of course not… Rachel = accident prone)

 

But with high hopes, we headed to a local bounce house for Itty Bit’s birthday celebration.

And if you get nothing out of this post whatsoever (except a profound sense of gratefulness that you are not spectacularly clumsy) – take this:

FAKE MOUSTACHES ARE THE WORLD’S BEST PARTY FAVOR

 

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Our Birthday Boy was far too busy playing for his new facial hair to stick around long…

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He was a sweaty little blur – but he couldn’t get enough.

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And this my friends… is where my legendary injury-attraction begins.  Right in front of that very first step up the ladder to the giant slide.

See, the party plan let one parent in free per child.  And since I knew Mr. Daddy wasn’t going to lose his redneck status by doing something so undignified… I jumped right in (pun fully intended).

IMG_3103

(look close, you can still see the lovely burn on my arm)

The real show started while gearing up for another run.  I stood on the inflatable, sideways at the base of the ladder.  I hollered for Itty Bit to join me.

Little Jo was excited for another run too.

Except Little Jo forgot that she isn’t quite so Little anymore.

I think the intent was to jump beside me… but instead… well, she jumped on me.

And as I felt the wall of the inflatable giving way behind me…

…ever seen this?

 

 

Except that we had a two-for-one special.

I kid you not.  The inflatable vaulted us both backwards through the air, OVER the wall of the inflatable

…into the video game section.

I literally flew through the air like this:

Gymtidedotcom

My head hit first.

I crashed into a half-wall that was protecting the video games, and that beautiful pike position meant that my formerly-intact shin also greeted the very intact half-wall.

Little Jo came crashing down on top of me, and I was only able to partially break her fall before both of our heads hit the concrete floor with sickening thuds.

We drew an instant crowd.  Especially when my sister spotted blood on the floor and we couldn’t immediately figure out who the bleeder was.

While Little Jo became a wee bit hysterical (I love you, silly girl), I decided to stick with the tried-and-true avoid throwing up in public after a possible concussion thing.

I think the owners were slightly nervous that an ADULT had managed to injure themselves in a freak accident (as well as nearly taking out a couple of Frogger machines).

We both sat down with our respective ice packs and enjoyed the rest of the party from a safe distance.

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Oh, and I found a perfect set of scratches on my arm from Little Jo’s journey as well.  That brings the total count to…

Waitaminute… I forgot the lovely broken toe from Mr. Daddy’s determination to scare the everloving snot out of me by gently touching my back while I was stalking a spider.  The graceful dancer that I am, shrieked, promptly fell to the floor on top of the spider, and contorted my poor appendages in directions they should not naturally go in an effort to save myself from the miniscule insect.  Broken toe.  Thank you, Dear.

 

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(Seriously… I sucked at Pictionary)

 

Oh… an ironic epilogue?  Any wonders where I got the let’s try something fun and dangerous gene?  Here’s my mom and sister AFTER two of us had already gotten hurt:

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What about you?  Any crazy injuries?  Historic blunders?  Outrageous or amazing tales?

We’d love to have you join in!  True Story Tuesday is all about those almost-too-good-to-be-true stories that are told every year at family reunions.  You can even use an existing post (because Lord knows, we’ve probably all blogged them at some point?) – just copy and paste the button from the sidebar into your post, come back and link up below.  We’ll be around for some comment love!

46 comments:

blueviolet said...

I don't even know what to say. I'm not sure you'll ever learn your lesson! ;)

Allenspark Lodge said...

I am speechless.

Bill

Pam Bowers said...

Girl, you need to invest in some bubble wrap! Ouchie...

I love the accompanying illustration.

singedwingangel said...

I personally love your illustrating skills.. and in the same instance am in awe at your luck. Seriously?? I am attempting to visualize it in my mind and at the same time realizing I would have FLIPPED out myself had I seen it and been prepared to call an ambulance

Tina said...

Wow...I thought I was the clumsy one! Bless your heart..you are all beat up. I've broken my toe several times..usually by kicking a vacuum cleaner or a porch post, by accident of course! I love your story!

Tamar SB said...

Oh my word! Are you ok!! I am so accident prone (I re-broke, yes rebroke, my nose at the gym yesterday doing crunches) - maybe I should avoid the bounce house like the plague.... Feel better!!!

Kmama said...

I had to laugh at blueviolet's comment.

Sometimes, it's not about learning your lesson, but for those of us who are accident prone, there's just no hiding from it, is there?

stephanie said...

the mental image of you hurtling through the air is hysterical- I am so sorry! I can sympathize because I'm a little, ok a lotta, clumsy too!!

Shana said...

Oh my Lord Rachel. You are passing your accident proneness on to you unsuspecting niece lol. I have a dose of fear already for what Blaze can get hurt on and now I am worried about bounce houses haha. I really had to laugh even though I didn't want to because I was sad you got hurt but it is epic. I am dying here.

Beth said...

Please tell us SOMEONE caught that on video? And if not ... go do it again for the cameras! :) Sorry you added to the injury list but goodness gracious girlie ... you have some awesome tales to tell!

Heather said...

I am so glad you weren't hurt worse! But ya'll are awfully cute even injured.

I am legendarily clumsy and can be counted on to either injure myself or expose myself!!

Stacy said...

Oh my goodness...that is scary! You both could have gotten a concussion pretty easy. At least it was fun...up until that point, right?? ;) Looks like the kids were having a super fun time anyways. Our kids love those places, too. :)

Oh, and Kai is very much accident prone, too. Did you see the picture last week of his bandage on his eyebrow? The wind whipped a PAPER BAG at him and it drew blood. Seriously...you can't make this stuff up LOL!

I will have to scare up an old email I sent to my family. I will hopefully have a story for you next week.

Jennie said...

Oh my! It seems like you guys are lucky you didn't get seriously injured... I'll remember to be on guard when John gets old enough for bounce houses! Happy birthday to your sweet little guy :)

Foursons said...

Oh dear Rachel, did I teach you NOTHING about the danger of slides with my 6 part post on them? *tsk-tsk*

GunDiva said...

You wouldn't believe that I just dreamed about you getting hurt fighting zombies last night (I'm so not kidding). You were in a little zombie coma for a bit before you woke up and (again, I can't make this up) all of your blogging buddies were lined up outside your door to say hi when you finally came around.

Girl, you've got to stop getting hurt :) Even if it is funny.

Anything Fits A Naked Man said...

Wow! Now THAT'S a party! What I love about ALL of this is that you were still smiling even after all the pain! You ROCK, girl!! I need to party with YOU!!

Kitchen Belleicious said...

You are accident prone like my mom. I am too much of a wuss to get into your messes. What a fun party though- of course I would imagine any type of get together is fun if your there. What will she do next is probably the question on everyone's mind!

Buckeroomama said...

Life sure could be really exciting around you! I was shaking my head in mindless wonder at how you seem to be a magnet for these types of situation. :)

And your mom? Really, truly, she rocks. (...and I still cannot get over how you all could be walking down the street and if I run into you, I really would think that you all are sisters!) I thought your sister was going to flip her backwards --now that would have been something!

He & Me + 3 said...

OUCH! Try to stay out of harms way this week.
Omgosh...I did that thing in the water at camp one year as a counselor and one of the male counselors sent me flying so high. I got out of the water after doing a complete butt smacker...with a bruise on the back of my thighs the size of a basketball. Lasted longer than the week of camp. Hurt so bad!

Emmy said...

Oh my goodness! Wait did you sau who's blood it was? Or did I miss that in all the drama?? Holy cow glad you both came out of that intact-ish. Maybe you should get paced walls :)

RaD said...

Oh my goodness, I'm guessing you're okay now because well, how else would you blog about it. But ouch! So glad you guys didn't get major, MAJOR hurt from it.

Lexie Loo & Dylan Too said...

Okay, girl, I'm going to send you a big box of bubble wrap and a helmet! LOL!

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affordable bounce houses said...

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