I cannot resist.
I warned you about this ridiculous curse of messing with song lyrics…
I like elbutts and I cannot lie
You other bloggers can’t deny
When a nurse walks in with little dinner plate
and a shocked look on her face…
I apologize. But that really did happen.
And an apology to Brandi. See, I thought this was her little boy’s elbutt.
When in fact, it was her.
Skinny little thing… I’m not sure we can be friends anymore.
Though I am still wetting my pants with her “LMEO”… I am annoying everyone by saying, “laughing my elbutt off” constantly. They think I’m weird. You internet pals are the only ones who get me :)
So we were last in the waiting room… being distracted by parade of cheekiness that was blowing up my phone.
After 4 hours, finally…
He's out. He did good and is in recovery. With the nutso snow... we may not get a room for awhile (less staff here). Logging off for a bit while I wait another hour to see how he wakes up. Please pray for a quick and easy wakeup and fast healing!
Oh... and his surgeon isn't big on hugs. Ask me how I know.
I have a hard time putting it to words – feeling helpless when I finally found him laying in pain.
They’d had trouble with the breathing tube and he was pretty banged up. Each time they asked him to rate his pain, he’d hold up two fingers (seriously macho dude? TWO?) then slowly fingerspell to me.
He couldn’t even speak. This wasn’t a TWO.
I pulled rank and asked for painkillers.
Morphine went in.
A second round of morphine.
I ached every time I saw his fingers sign it.
Apparently the man is one of the 7% of the population that morphine does not work on.
Morphine abandoned, the next medicine finally gave him sleep.
I could finally breathe. And knew we were just surrounded with prayer. I watched that stained glass window glow brighter and brighter through the evening until I finally nodded off in the wee hours.
As we slept, that snow gained a sparkly layer of ice. I began to worry about our return trip home.
When he finally felt well enough for a meal… they committed an unpardonable offense.
But how could I not laugh at GunDiva?
You can NOT give a redneck a veggie burger? Is this the surgeon's payback for the hug?
We realized quickly that we were going to be snowed in. You know it’s bad when you’re on the top of an icy hill and kids are SKIING down it. And when the news keeps showing your entire county without power. And your family sends you pictures of your newly renovated property.
Reports of trees down on our property. Praying they don't hit the fenceline & free the horses. Next door trees on house & truck. Tree just fell on power lines right in front of our house :(
Umm yeah… that line across the middle of the picture. Not supposed to be there. It was uber freaky having three power lines down at the house.
A niece’s car was moved to the other side of our property right before a tree fell where it had been 20 minutes earlier.
And the fenceline? Wrecked.
But hey… on the bright side, the flooding covered it and my prissy horse won’t make a break for it through the water.
Then we got a call.
Mr. Daddy’s father was in the ER, being admitted for emergency surgery.
Seriously Lord? One more thing???
Then they told us to stay at the hospital one more day.
And if this all seems neverending, it’s because it really and truly felt that way the whole week.
We were finally released on Friday… some of the nursing staff had been snowed in and bunking in patient rooms since Tuesday. When we left to check out, there was only one other patient there.
While they searched for a doctor to clear Mr. Daddy, we were suddenly yanked back from the finish line:
Really?!?!?!! Fire alarm at hospital forced us all to evacuate out into snow. They couldn't get him down in wheelchair so he had to go down 3 flights of stairs. No coat & hurting. Then back up 3 flights.
I was DONE by that point. Walking down those flights holding his elbow, then out into the snow… I wanted to cry. I missed my kid, we needed to get back to my father-in-law, we needed to be HOME.
When we finally posted bail, I braved the scary hill. Then the freeway with chunks of snow flying off other vehicles at us. Ten minutes into the drive, a soft chuckle…
“You’re gonna wear the skin off my hand if you keep that up”.
“Oh sorry”, as I released my deathgrip.
Even gas pumps were without power. We found one lit up and waited 30 minutes for the privilege of filling up.
Cars abandoned along the road. Traffic lights dark. Complete carnage.
The trees – I still want to cry – just sheared. On a scale I never imagined. The snow completely covered with green boughs and broken trunks.
My mom told us they lost power too – they lit a fire to keep Itty Bit warm. I’ve never been away from my kiddo three days.
She didn’t tell me until later that they couldn’t even leave the house… snowed in the driveway and a tree across the road. Then this:
What you don’t see… is that only the right side of the tree had broken at first. After the dust had cleared, my mom and Itty Bit were out sawing it into smaller pieces.
When they heard it begin to crack again.
Not knowing where it would fall, my mother threw herself on Itty Bit (and I’m sure she prayed).
My heart stopped as she told me…
In the aftermath, the tree split into six pieces, and the last came crashing down onto the barn my grandfather had help build before he died.
(Mom, I love you… thank you for protecting our son).
We bundled up Itty Bit and finally arrived home five hours after leaving the hospital.
Our beloved Cutie Left and Cindy Lou Hoo were also without power and no source of heat. We asked them to camp out by our woodstove.
(no pictures of that night, but aren’t they ridiculously cute?)
Except that poor Cindy Lou Hoo was sick. Fever, cough, and ultimately throwing up.
No running water + throw up = lots and lots of paper towels and cuddles.
The next night? Rinse, lather, and repeat. Without power still.
Husband recovering from surgery (defying orders and carrying in firewood), lipreading by Coleman lanterns, sick girlie, stir-crazy boys, and father-in-law in hospital.
Five days later… power was restored. And I praised the Lord for hot showers and kids not asking, “which one is the poop toilet again?”
Is it crazy to think that LA laughed at us for calling this “Snowmageddon”?
I feel like a survivor and I should have a t-shirt to prove it.
Thank you to those of you who joined the “Two Elbutts for Mr. Daddy” campaign. For those of you who joined in fasting and who sent messages, cards, cookies (Beth) and even CHOCOLATE! (My big fat elbutt thanks you, Tiffany!)
You deserve a t-shirt for making it through this post…
I promise we have some fun coming up. Stay tuned for a bit of competition!