If it seems like I’m a wee bit behind in posting, it’s because I have an unnatural fear of blogging without pictures.
And since my camera and nice lens complained slightly when I *ahem* DROPPED THEM, my pictures are pretty darn woeful.
I’m only slightly bitter. Seeing as all my friends have turned pro and I’ve been left to cry into my broken shutter.
(Anyone want to sell my husband a gently used Canon 5D Mark III? I mean, you’d be helping a nice guy get major birthday cred. And restoring his wife to sane. Mostly.)
So suffer with me for a bit, just to catch up on some crazy?
Remember the dude who knocked me down ?
Well, I didn’t come back on here and tell y’all because I was too embarrassed, but the dork added insult to injury by spectacularly blowing up and bolting as I stood on the other side of the fence by a muddy patch.
My poor kid stared at me in astonishment as I tried to navigate to a sink through my poop-covered glasses.
Friends, it was much worse than last time…
There was no hat to protect top of my head, which sustained several direct hits of stinky goo. I won’t tell you how much got into my mouth (I was screaming after all), but after my husband attempted to snap photos, I made sure to kiss him goodnight ;)
But really, the almost-makes-it-worthwhile moment came when I scored my very own illustration by the esteemed Beel!
The resemblance is uncanny. Joey is even smiling.
Though he may have offered the artwork as a truce after getting busted trying to talk Mr. Daddy into sharing the cellphone evidence.
We had a freaky heat streak and took advantage of it to hit up the Spring Fair. You know how fairgrounds are ripe for people watching? I guess it kind of defeats the purpose when people are looking at YOU.
I realized too late why Itty Bit was attracting attention…
Afterward, Itty Bit would say his favorite part was “when the man in the logging show talked like a baby”. I did happen to recall that moment when Red squeaked, “I’m going home now” after this little gem:
See what I mean?
We returned home to the insanity that is t-ball season. Oh, and Spring got all un-confused and dumped buckets on us.
Umm… he swung from left to right… the ball totally jumped over the bat.
And because I love y’all, and we could probably use a good laugh…
I will post this with the preface that this is as close to PG-13 as I get, but DEAR LORD, I could not.stop.laughing.
Is there somebody who checks the spacing before the news titles get published to mobile websites?
Lord, I apologize.
He talked about growing up HUNGRY!
And bless the starving pygmies in New Guinea.