Thursday, August 16, 2012

Insignificant

 

 

The bouquet of roses is slowly wilting on the kitchen counter.

Bittersweet evidence of a brutal week that contained far too many petty disagreements.

 

I can feel it sucking me in.  Making me grumpier with those I love.

The daily situation that receives constant evaluation…

 

“is this worth a day of my life?”

 

 

And as ugly as it gets, and as pointedly personal as it gets… the answer is still yes.

 

Yes because it’s wrong.

Yes because it needs to be made right.

Yes because no one should ever have to go through this.

Yes because someone WILL have to go through this if I don’t.

 

And when it’s not about you, your perspective resets.

 

It is amazing how many insignificant things create so much consternation and worry.  Where is God in this worry?

 

It’s so much easier to focus on those insignificant things, than to deal with the heartache of “that thing I can’t talk about”.

 

matter

 

 

And then?  A family whose blog I’d been following for years suffered the ultimate heartache.  I read the post and couldn’t breathe.

 

Their sweet Bubba was gone.

 

 

Bubba

(I’m sorry for stealing the photo – how he makes me smile)

 

I love how this kid showed Jesus in his JOY of living.  I love that gift he had of being happy in any circumstance.  And this hero had more “circumstances” in 11 years, than most of us will have in a lifetime.

 

I adore this picture.  I adore that his mom took so many amazing happy photos, that I had a terrible time picking one.  Thank you for sharing him with us Julie.

My boy has known Bubba since he was three years old  - through the computer screen.  He says Bubba is his friend.  Somehow, I always thought we would meet someday.

And we will.  But it seems so strange to miss him even on the other side of the internet.

 

And that thing I can’t talk about?  God’s got it.  I don’t want to waste this hard stuff.  But I refuse to let it steal my joy.

 

And in finding those things that God grins about until you notice them?

 

pilot

 

Itty Bit and his pilot goggles.

Entertaining every single pedestrian downtown.

 

So thankful.

 

 

 

What are you thankful for today?

18 comments:

Bethany said...

Hugs and prayers for you, friend. Your joy is contagious even in the all the surrounding circumstances. Praying that there will be resolution to this "thing" as quickly as possible. Looking forward to the day it is all redeemed.
And that Itty Bit. Too stinking funny! Those glasses rock. :)

Tamar SB said...

So sorry for your friends. What heartbreak. Itty Bit in those goggles omg love!

Angel Shrout said...

OK first of all have we not discussed making me ugly cry at 7 am?? I cannot imagine. You know me, I had to click the links. I had to read about this amazing child who was gone, long before anyone wanted him to be. My heart goes out to the Presley family, and you my friend. Sometimes it is the small things that make us take stock. Psalm 91 sweetie, King David, who had yet to be King and was laying low in caves and anywhere he could lay his head, was tired. He was tired of doing the right thing and still getting chased by Saul, He was tired of being the only one who understood how hard it was to have respect for a King you would one day replace, when all that Saul had done was attempt to destroy him. Even though David had done nothing but good for Saul. In desperation he cried out, he told God he knew that his protection and refuge was in Him and Him alone. But there were days, so many days, when it still felt too much. When it was all just too much and he was tired, and everything came at once to overtake him. In his cries God showed him the strength of His arm over him, He showed David that yes it looked bad, but in reality he wasn't IN it simply surrounded by it. The whole time God had covered him with his wings, tucking him under like a mama bird does her young. In that moment David did not see all the stuff that had gone wrong, he saw all the things that didn't. Despite the best efforts of those who had tried. That is where you are my friend. In the cave doing the right thing and feeling as if it is bouncing off walls. When it reality it is bouncing off the feathers of God's protection in your life. Just as your arrows seem to be falling short, so do the enemies. Keep that in mind darling.

Kmama said...

I'm sorry it has been such a horrific week. I'm thinking of you.

Prayers go out to your friends. I just cannot imagine.

Mr. Daddy said...

Well Dear:)

I am eternally thankful for you :)


just saying:)

Anonymous said...

Psalm 10:14

But you, O God, do see trouble and grief; you consider it to take it in hand. The victim commits himself to you; you are the helper of the fatherless.

Anonymous said...

Isaiah 57:1-2

The righteous perish,
and no one ponders it in his heart;devout men are taken away,
and no one understands
that the righteous are taken away
to be spared from evil.
Those who walk uprightly
enter into peace;they find rest as they lie in death.


Furry Bottoms said...

I had to go and check out that blog. My goodness, Bubba really does capture your heart. I kept rolling on and on and on looking at all those incredible pictures of such a happy boy. I am very thankful for you-- for pointing me in that direction so I could experience a tiny bit of Bubba myself.

I am sorry you've had such a hard week. Its really hard when perspective is set in front of you. Like a reality slap to the face. But its happening for a reason, as I am sure you know.

Take care, my friend.

sara said...

still praying for you and yours as God brings you to my mind.

Today, as I am sad seeing my son leave for college to be followed by the other 2 this next week and as I face empty nest for the first time....I am grateful that I have 3 wonderful kids that are ready to spread their wings and prepared to move forward and grateful that God has them in His sights even when I don't.

Susan said...

Like you, I was devastated by sweet Bubba's death. I had followed Julie's blog for a long time and through her openness and sharing felt like I knew the family too. In the midst of my breaking heart, I imagined their sweet Uncle Bill being the first to hug Bubba and welcome him to Heaven. It helped me cope. Knowing that Bubba lives on in others who received the enormous gift of his organs also helped me cope. That Julie and Jason chose to put their anger to rest in order to honor Bubba through the lives of others helped keep me from feeling anger over his sudden passing. When anyone does the "one foot in front of the other" with their heads and hearts pointed toward the future, to get through hard, terrifying days, it inspires me. I know this has been a difficult year that has had its hardships for you too. We all want you to triumph over that "thing you can't talk about," and we wait for the news that Mr. Daddy has conquered his medical challenge. Know that you're in the prayers of many and that you're also an inspiration. Keep that silly sense of humor and that one foot in front of the other. As surely as anyone else has, you are making your way through the tough stuff with enough grit for the challenge.

As for Itty Bit? Well, he's definitely Steampunk Kiddo in his goggles! He'll always give you the laugh you need to balance the hard stuff. Love on him extra this week, in memory of his friend Bubba.

GunDiva said...

Thank you for sharing Bubba's family with me.

The stuff in your life is still kind of yucky, but sometimes a little perspective is a good thing.

Love you guys - give everyone big ol' hugs for me.

Foursons said...

First off, where in the world did you get pilot goggles?!

Secondly, I don't even know what to say. Life has thrown some hard knocks lately and the only possible response to them can be prayer. Hang in there, an end is in sight.

Anonymous said...

Luv the goggles!

Amy said...

I am thankful for you sweet friend. I am thankful that even though I have never met you, God is using you in my life. God is bigger than all of this girl, so keep your chin up. God is bigger than statistics, bigger than circumstances, bigger than our worst days. Praying for you always! Someday I plan to wrap my arms around your neck and give you the best hug in the world!!!!

Buckeroomama said...

{{{Hugs}}}

I thought of you when we were north of the border from you... Thinking of you still and praying for you and yours.

I am thankful for perspective.

SHANA said...

Just want to say I am praying for you guys and also for Buddy's family. I love the goggle photos. Too cute.

Angie Vik said...

I followed the link to Julie's blog and read about the passing of her sweet son. What an unpleasant whammy. Just when I start to feel sorry for myself I read something like that and am reminded once again of how much I have to be thankful for.
Itty Bit is very cute. Some day you can explain to him how me made lots of people on the internet smile with his antics.

Lexie Loo, Lily Boo, and Dylan Too! said...

I hope things have improved for you.
Sending prayers to that sweet family.