As in… tomorrow is officially Itty Bit’s first day of first grade, so this is the long overdue post of where on earth our summer went.
And to prove that we actually did have a summer… 94 degrees HOLLA!
We’re in the 80’s now, with some gorgeous lawn crisping going on.
Anyone recall that crazy redneck parade that happens here every year?
The one that Itty Bit ADORES?
Man… I totally jinxed the “I’m not going to cry before my baby goes back to school” thing when I went back looking at parade day pictures through the years.
(you know you’ve been around here for awhile when you remember this
original introduction of Itty Bit’s double eyebrows!)
(you might think the noteworthy thing here is that he could still fit into those glasses and hat the next year. but women everywhere will understand when I say, Thank You Jesus for that little head!)
What on earth would make a kid freak out like that? Umm yeah. The same thing as last year and the year before and… ad nauseam.
Are you guys getting this? Because the dude has a busted foot and he’s driving that monster with a CRUTCH on the gas pedal. Holding the crutch with his right hand and throwing candy with his left. We live dangerously around here.
And who doesn’t love a good ol’ burnout?
That might have had something to do with why we had the obligatory horse-that-sidepasses-the-entire-parade. Remember this one?
Speaking of horses. Remember that super-sekrit post about our neighbors and their *ahem* questionable horse smarts? (Caution – that post is also otherwise known as The One Thousand Ninety-Six comment Facebook status, no joke.)
Well… I’ve tried to catch them on video a time or two while they are “training” their horse to dance.
I can respect culture… I just can’t handle watching someone tie a horse down and beat its legs with a stick to make it “dance”.
This post wasn’t supposed to be a downer – but watch what happens when these guys see me standing there with a camera on the parade route? (Because they quit hitting the horse every time they see that camera otherwise):
Go ahead… just watch the expressions – dare you not to giggle.
heeeyyy! I’m in a parade! Isn’t my horse gorgeous?
Wait a minute. I know you!
Hey guys. Guys! Don’t look over there.
It’s that crazy woman with the camera. Don’t look at her!
And just because I can. Seriously… look at their faces!
Scared of little ol’ me? Pshaw.
Back to the craziness of the redneck parade. Does yours have random Darth Vaders and biohazard suit guys on bikes?
Or the parade grand marshal, Chewbacca?
Or GRANDMA?!?! Yeah… in the red shirt with the puppet :)
Next on the list was the county fair. Where Itty Bit forsook all other rides and only wanted to bounce.
Don’t you love it when you get home and you realize that there is a whole story going on in your pictures and you had NO CLUE at the time? The guy running the trampoline was a hoot!
Then somebody had a birthday.
If you guessed Itty Bit, you’d be wrong. The man of the house is the one who can’t stop quoting Kung Fu Panda.
My parents write the funniest stuff on giftwrap. (Remember the legendary one?)
“We luv u, Son, and you can have our Bud-Light”
I promise, we didn’t let Itty Bit drink it.
In fact, it’s still in the fridge.
It’s just wrong to drink alcohol from your parents, right?
And in ultra-redneck news, check out the celebratory plate…
Mom, that was a chocolate éclair with a candle, right?
And some kind of smoked salmon hotdog thingie?
I’m still kinda disturbed.
I reeeaaaally wanted to get these for Mr. Daddy’s birthday:
(squirrel insanity here)
Then we hit up another county fair.
The difference between state fairs and county fairs is right here folks:
Them are some first class hogs.
Mr. Daddy shelled out 30 smackeroos for Itty Bit to win a $5 Minion.
A creepy McCreeperson guy dressed as a geriatric Captain America approached Itty Bit at that junction.
I thought, “duuuude… six-year-old with a sharp object… creepy guy… you’d better run”
But the thirty bucks? Worth every penny.
I promise, not much longer…
Another important element of redneck fairs? The antique tractors.
Picture #1: He makes vroom vroom noises.
Picture #2: He discovers the seat is wet.
Small town summer days include the fire truck showing up at church.
Honey? Better get away from…
Oh Butter. Ohhhhh Butter.
And on a beautiful day when Mr. Daddy had saved up some energy – we hit the harbor for some fun.
(remember Dana telling the whole world that Mr. Daddy had crabs?!?!)
and then Mr. Daddy had his fingers smashed approximately 42 times by a miniature hammer in the kid craft zone.
Gratuitous gun show shot. You’re welcome.
But the real fun?
Was another kiddo outgrowing a toy.
And not being able to keep a secret long enough for us to get a proper helmet for a certain thrilled speedster.
we found a full racing helmet pretty darn quick after this:
(Gas engine + gravel = crash. It was only funny because he and the fence and the quad were ok!)
So if you lasted this long – 50,000 OnceUponAmiracle points to you! And a special freebie entry into our super fun giveaway coming soon! Remember to enter AS YOU WISH in the upcoming contest entries!